Edward and Bella: True Love or True Lust?

Sparked by a recent conversation with my friend Hillary, I have decided I need to post my thoughts about a certain series of novels written by Stephenie Meyer. Particularly the relationship between one, Bella, and the object of her affection. The supposedly uber hot vampire, Edward.

Believe me when I say Edward has been well cast in the movie which is scheduled for release in December of this year. I thought Robert Pattinson was exceedingly good looking when I first saw him in Harry Potter (as Cedric Diggory) and I eagerly await his debut in a role that will likely earn him unending fame amongst giddy teenage girls for years to come.
But enough about young hot guys whose posters would have hung on my wall as a teenager.

Besides having a knack for catching spelling and punctuation errors I think a lot about how a certain book might influence its audience, and what I think the author should have done differently in writing it based on that.

Can you see why I haven’t written a novel yet? I’m too busy thinking about subtle messages I want to convey instead of the actual story. But I digress.

The main audience in the case of the Twilight series, are a bunch of giggly teenage girls with egregious romantic notions that play out in their daydreams over and over, or which they speak to each other in hushed tones during sleepovers. Oh, and grown women who are often silly school girls at heart. Ahem….

***Warning - Spoilers Ahead!***

I devoured all three of Stephanie’s books, each within a day of borrowing them. I didn’t think much about them initially. I was caught up in the intense romance, the stunningly accurate view through a teenage girls mind. I identified immensely with Bella and her feelings of being so very ordinary. I also understood her intense attraction to Edward. I always crushed on the mysterious guys. The dangerous guys.

But the more I’ve mulled over this vehement love story, the more concerned I’ve become in what I anticipate will be its ending. Especially when thinking about the thousands of teenage girls who worship this series. So I say….

Bella really needs to break things off with Edward.

Let me offer up my reasons for this before any of you kick me:

1. Holy Co-Dependent Relationship Batman!
Co-Dependant relationships are never healthy and Bella and Edward have got a doozie of one going on. It may not have started that way but it’s turned into that. Grieving for those we’ve loved and lost is certainly natural but Bella took it well beyond that point, ceasing to be anything but a drone doing only what she had to in order to survive after Edward left. Then of course Edward has sworn to kill himself shortly after the time Bella has died.
Sweet? Romantic? Nay I say. Mentally Ill. And I can say this, because I KNOW mentally ill. :)

Other problems with their relationship that hinge on co-dependency:
* Lack of interaction with other friends and acquaintances
* Bella’s mental attention focusing solely on relieving Edward’s pain i.e. If she’s a vampire, he won’t struggle with wanting to kill her anymore. If she’s a vampire, she’ll finally be worthy of him.
* Feeling her life is meaningless without him.

2. Bella is being smothered
Edward and his family are controlling Bella. They may not be doing it on purpose but that doesn’t make it any better. Bella seems to attract danger and Edward feels the need to protect her. He watches her all night, she gets driven by them everywhere. She rarely does anything of her own accord or by herself and when she does she know she’ll face Edwards disapproval afterwards. Their relationship has become more and more like a naughty little child disobeying her master. *shudder*

3. They don’t really love each other
They lust each other. The only basis for Bella’s devotion and supposed love that I can find are descriptions of Edwards danger and his beauty. And do you think for one moment that Edward would have taken a second glance at Bella (other than to eat her) if he had been able to read her thoughts? He was bound to be obsessed with the first girl who had the power to block him out. They are enchanted by the mystery of each other. Is this love? No. Could it turn into love? Certainly. But book three definitely had their relationship getting more and more icky.

4. My belief in number 3 was only reaffirmed by the part Jacob has played.
I won’t tell you that I think Bella should end up with Jacob instead. That’s a whole other problem relationship, though not quite as bad as the one Bella and Edward have. But being around Jacob’s friendly self brought some vigor back into her life. It was good that she didn’t perceive him as a possible love interest or she may have latched on to him in rebound as she had to Edward in the first place, becoming more needy and dependent on his feeding her constant reassurances than she had been with Edward. Slowly and without force, Jacob’s friendship brought her back to life, and though she still grieved for Edward, she was finally living again.

I also agree with Jacob that eventually she would have been happy without Edward. She would have maybe even realized that her love for Jacob was perhaps deeper than the one she had with Edward. After all, shouldn’t your true love also be your best friend?

As an adult I’ve looked back on some relationships I had as a teen in which I was sure I really loved the person. I did care deeply about them. It was love of a sort. But not the kind that would have withstood the fizzling of passion and the inevitable changing of beliefs and shifts in personality we make until we die.

So Stephenie Meyer, if you’re reading this, do you really want to send a message that co-dependent relationships are romantic? That ceasing to live for yourself is romantic? That being willing to kill yourself over the one you love is romantic? That love is based on mystery, danger and good looks alone?

I don’t care who she ends up with ultimately (though I do hope that if it’s Edward their relationship improves) but please do us all a favor and have Bella learn to think and live for herself and grow out of this sickening neediness and willingness to be controlled.

Alright, why am I right? Why am I wrong? Keep it respectful please.

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Comments (144)

camilleJanuary 21st, 2008 at 2:39 am

we’re having our RS book club this month on this book and I’m totally printing your post and using it! (with your permission, of course.)

love, love, love these books and can’t wait for the movie. I just hope Bella isn’t tooo whiny.

aubreyJanuary 21st, 2008 at 2:43 am

i just finished reading the looking glass wars, which is the first in a trilogy about the “real” story of alice and wonderland. and i LOVED the strong female role models in this book as opposed to dumb bella swan in the twilight series. don’t get me wrong..i was as entranced and addicted to the twilight books as the next woman. but, frankly, bella is pathetic.

aubreyJanuary 21st, 2008 at 2:44 am

p.s. your reasons for wanting bella to choose jacob over edward echo mine.

CorrieJanuary 21st, 2008 at 3:10 am

I don’t like either one. Bella is a very selfish gal, i wish there was some way for her to grow up, and somehow she has to want children. It just doesn’t make sense to me.

MinisinooJanuary 21st, 2008 at 3:53 am

You have summarized excellently exactly the problems I had with this book. I’ll be linking to this from my own blog (which I gave in the website address above). The message being conveyed in these books is *disturbing*. I think I identified less with Bella (I confess I mostly found her annoying). And while I understand that Edward’s behavior may be historically accurate for his era, he needs to be sat down and told to quit it.

There is something Lolita-ish about their relationship. I understand her appeal to him. ‘Singing blood’ (er, raging hormones allusion much?), plus the fact she must be a *relief* from the constant mental chatter. (And as you point out, she’d be far less interesting to him if he could read her mind.) But really. He’s 100+? Even if he acts disturbingly like a 17-year-old at times. (Do vampires get ’stuck’ emotionally at the age they were when made vampires?) And while he is certainly ‘dangerous,’ oddly I found that to be less of a worry (since he obviously seems to struggle against that) than the AGE issue.

Bella needs a boy her age. Edward needs a woman his age (which is probably only possible with another vampire).

God save them from getting married.

HumbugGirlJanuary 21st, 2008 at 8:02 am

I’m hear via the link from Minisinoo’s LJ.

…and I agree completely. Honestly, it’s like you read my mind when you were writing this. You’ve actually made me think of a few new things as well, such as the fact that Bella’s relationship with Edward is based on lust rather than love. It seems obvious now that it has been pointed out to me.

Thanks for sharing your thoughts.

JennyJanuary 21st, 2008 at 8:26 am

It is not exactly what I am thinking but it is close.

Edward has a point when he insisted on Bella having human experiences. The one fault Bella has is that she is so single-minded about the changing that she forgets to ponder any other possibilities and Edward is not helping.

I have one point where I really disagree with you. The smothering thing. She seems to be in constant danger of getting attacked by an vampire, so as the Cullens are the only ones who can protect her, they need to close to her. I agree the “Edward being in her room all night” thing is a bit too much but the rest sounds reasonable for someone is in danger of getting killed. What bugs me is that being her bodyguards, the Cullens are way too close to her.

Well, for the sake of the teenage fangirls, I really want them to marry and Bella to have first time sex with him and Edward changing her (because at the bottom of my heart, I am one of those fangirls.)

DedeeJanuary 21st, 2008 at 10:17 am

I didn’t even read books two and three. Number one was absorbing, but I didn’t love it. I actually gave mine away. My only response was that I sincerely hope that my daughter does not act that way. Ew!

I was an arrogant, self centered teen (as most are) but I was never obsessed. I got over the obsession thing in 9th grade. Thankfully!

Susan MJanuary 21st, 2008 at 12:07 pm

I agree with most of the comments here. Bella annoys me no end. She’s always thinking “What’s so great about me?” and I always agree with her.

Jacob annoys me even more. He’s so bitter and lame.

I think these books had some interesting ideas and great potential but just weren’t executed very well. A lot of it seemed very contrived to me.

KimberlyJanuary 21st, 2008 at 12:11 pm

I’m skipping to the end of this just to say hi. I haven’t read ‘em yet and frankly, I’m scared too!

JenniferJanuary 21st, 2008 at 12:12 pm

Thank you so very much for posting this! I grew to loathe Bella and Edward in turns as I worked at reading the third book. Their relationship is so co dependent and dysfunctional it’s not funny. I did love the sharp contrast with how she behaved with Jacob. We saw so much of who Bella really is when she was with him, risk taking and dangerous behavior aside of course.

I am mildly excited for the movie and hope the fourth book does not irritate me as badly as the third did.

Michelle at ScribbitJanuary 21st, 2008 at 1:42 pm

My daughter should weigh in on this, she LOVES those books.

Thalia's ChildJanuary 21st, 2008 at 1:44 pm

I spent the entire third book hoping that Jacob would have that werewolf attachment thing happen so that Bella would snap out of it and wind up with him.

Alas… it was not to be.

MagirkJanuary 21st, 2008 at 1:53 pm

My sister-in-law’s teenage niece has been acting out her ‘girly fantasy’s’ after reading this book, by dating (attaching herself to?) a senior in high school - she’s not even a freshman yet! Her mom asked her “Why do you like this guy? Is he cute? Nice? A gentleman?” “No.” was her response to those 3 questions. Fortunately, she was able to convince her to stop being a dork, giggly girl, wise up, and get away from him before the permanent damage was done.

Sorry. I haven’t read these books, nor do I plan to. But from what I’ve heard of them, I kinda hope they ‘fade away into the back shelf of the library’ before my daughter enters teenage-dom. IMHO (LOL) I guess I just don’t ‘get’ them.

EleniJanuary 21st, 2008 at 3:18 pm

I got your blog link from Minisinoo. I agree, their relationship is very codependent. Edward acts like a 17-year-old, despite being over 100-years-old. The term I’ve been using is “infatuated” to describe them, not in love. Bella seems more like a 30-something with a degree in English literature with disdain for her classmates.

Personally, I hope that Bella does improve her self-image in the fourth book, and that Edward stops being so overprotective, although I felt like he was just protecting her, up to a point, because of Victoria. The truth of the Cullen’s smothering or protecting will be revealed in book 4, I think. Were they protecting her because they didn’t want to see what would happen to Edward if something happened to Bella? That’s my question.

I personally think that Bella and Edward will end up together, because, really, SM will do that. I think she just will. I have the feeling Jacob’s going to imprint on somebody and forget all about Bella, and all she’s going to have left is Edward. If he’s being a co-dependent dork, still, I shudder at the thought.

HillaryJanuary 21st, 2008 at 4:02 pm

You already know that I agree with you. I’m making a link to this post because you say all of this way better than I ever could.

HollyJanuary 21st, 2008 at 4:19 pm

I agreed with everything! Great post. I’ve only read the first one and I thought it was so overrated. I love what you said about the fact that Edward would never have looked twice at Bella if he could read her mind. She’s annoying, selfish and weak. I have the other two books on hold at the library and I’ll read them when they become available, just to see what happens, but I don’t understand the whole hype behind them. The first one wasn’t even that well-written. She tried too hard for the big, heaving romantic stuff in the beginning. It was too forced and not natural. It took me until I was 3/4 of the way through it before the book really captured my attention.

I don’t get the hype. Especially from grown women. Teenage girls going nuts over it, I can see. Grown women? I don’t get it. But, then again, I don’t get the hype over High School Musical either. And grown women go nuts over it too.

Whatever.

HollyJanuary 21st, 2008 at 4:20 pm

By the way, it still doesn’t like me…

queeniedJanuary 21st, 2008 at 8:11 pm

Movie??? Did you say movie? Holy wow batman!!!!
i just bought the first in the series. I have two books that I am trying to finish before I start mainly because I fear that once I pick them up…I won’t be able to put them down. :)

SaraJanuary 21st, 2008 at 8:49 pm

This sums of a lot of what I think about Edward and Bella. I don’t know if I’d say that their love is clearly not real, but Stephenie Meyer just doesn’t do a good job of making their love convincing, which makes it seem very much like it is entirely just obsession and lust. The scenes with Jacob and Bella are written so much better because they’re more subtle. They have to be because she’s an unreliable narrator and doesn’t even realize she’s in love with him for a long time, so we are only shown in little ways that there’s something there while Bella is actually saying the opposite. Strangely enough, this somehow makes their romance so much more believable and real. It feels inevitable rather than forced and ridiculously exaggerated.

I think there might be a chance of Breaking Dawn not giving some horrible message to young girls about what love should be like if Bella goes through a lot of changing before the end of the book, which I’m sure she will have to. I think there might at least be a chance that Bella will decide not to become a vampire. I wrote an essay explaining how I think it would be a bad decision if Stephenie Meyer didn’t keep her human, which you might be interested in looking at: http://flowrs4ophelia.livejournal.com/72101.html
A lot of it contains the same feelings about E/B’s relationship as you’ve written about here, but I also wrote it to point out how there are alternatives to Bella becoming a vampire that are still possible even if there’s no way she’ll end up with Jacob. I need to have something to cross my fingers for reading the last book even though I know Jacob/Bella is not going to happen. Haha.

therealheffalumpJanuary 21st, 2008 at 9:08 pm

I personally would like to see Bella have some distant native american ancestry and turn out to be a Werewolf herself. Then she could take care of herself, she could imprint on someone else (not Jacob OR Edward), and maybe she would grow a backbone! Bwahahaha!

nicJanuary 21st, 2008 at 10:43 pm

While parts of this series royally tick me off, I actually enjoy the bella/edward duo.

I agree that many aspects of the relationship (and characters/plots in the series) can be dangerous for impressionable minds.

I don’t find Bella weak or pathetic. Physically, yes, but not in character or resolve. She holds her own, and I think that’s why Edward is drawn to her.

As for the movie–I think Stewart is spot on, but I’m not all the way sold on Pattison. Nothing against him, but I picture Edward more along the lines of Chace Crawford.

Thanks for a thoughtful post. :)

dapoppinsJanuary 21st, 2008 at 11:21 pm

I read the first book when it came out, before it got all huge. I thought it was so so, and didn’t like the way certain things were being glamified for a younger audience. I have been known to read romance novels. However, I don’t want my teen age daughter reading romance…(when she is a teen) and I will try to screen it from her. If that makes me controlling, so be it. I read a lot of stuff as a teen that I never, ever should have…its not just that it was romantic, it is the affect it had on me and my relationships.

JenniferJanuary 21st, 2008 at 11:32 pm

I’ve been saying this for awhile now! I really don’t care for the books or the characters, they are pretty much just romance novels with a vampire backdrop. Lust lust lust! Almost all, if not all, the characters are immature and shallow. Bella makes me want to scream because she’s so annoying I don’t know why people like her because she’s so whiny…

On Stephanie Meyer’s blog it looks like there’s quite a cast going on for the movie.

SummerJanuary 21st, 2008 at 11:42 pm

Camille - Of course you may print this post

Aubrey - I will be checking out The Looking Glass Wars now that you’ve recommended it

Corrie - I agree that Bella is very selfish

Minisinoo - Thanks for the link and your thoughts.

Susan - I agree that there are a great many obvious contrivances

Magirk - That kind of thing is exactly what I’m worried about

Sara - You said it so well with this:
The scenes with Jacob and Bella are written so much better because they’re more subtle. They have to be because she’s an unreliable narrator and doesn’t even realize she’s in love with him for a long time, so we are only shown in little ways that there’s something there while Bella is actually saying the opposite. Strangely enough, this somehow makes their romance so much more believable and real. It feels inevitable rather than forced and ridiculously exaggerated.

Nic - Funny that I’m more sold on Pattinson than Stewart. I suppose she’s fairly average looking, just not quite how I pictured Bella

Dapoppins - This is the first modern romance I’ve read (usually avoid the stuff) but so many people told me I had to read it. You can bet I’m not going to let my teenage girl get into these books if they don’t end more appropriately. Stephenie Meyer has a chance to teach an important lesson. I keep hoping she’s contrived these examples of horrible relationships to shun them in the end instead of glorifying them but I’m not seeing things turning that way.

Julie WrightJanuary 22nd, 2008 at 1:22 am

I am so glad to have been forwarded your blog link. You’ve echoed my very sentiment. I confess I finished the books in less than two days (Sometimes i’m a silly school girl too). I was caught up in the ultimate romance of the novel and ignored the rest. I agree that Bella is not a character I can empathize with. She’s weak. SM had the chance to make her much stronger in the end of book three with that whole fable of the woman who sacrificed herself. Bella makes an attempt to do this but fails miserably and her effort was pointless since Jacob was just faking his injury.

This coupled with the fact that Edward is controlling, obsessed and treats her like a child. I’d kill a guy who treated me like that. The relationships aren’t healthy. It’s kind of the Grease syndrome (nice girl has to change EVERYTHING about herself in order to get the guy she wants). Bella is only happy and fulfilled when she is away from Edward. When she’s with him she is very much the needy clingy child, incapable of caring for herself.

It’s a sad message to teens about love, respect, and companionship. And any teen that thinks they can sleep together every night and not have sex is totally fooling themselves.

KellanJanuary 22nd, 2008 at 1:38 am

WOW - I loved how you analyzed this and how everyone has their input! I haven’t read this series, but I want to see the movie - I love vampire movies and I love Robert Pattinson! I feel like a dope not being able to contribute - sorry. I enjoyed your perspective though. See ya. Kellan

kennalynJanuary 22nd, 2008 at 2:46 am

WOW. I so very much agree. I don’t know if my mom has posted a comment yet (too lazy to read right this minute) but if so, sorry for the possible repeat in opinion.

Bella is a better person when she’s with Jacob. Not that she deserves him. And I agree with everything you say and would add to it… why do girls think they have to change themselves - everything about them - giving up their entire lives and priorities for “the bad boy”? I and my mom/sisters all thought Bella was stu-pid. But still loved the books anyway. And still of course love Edward. And perhaps Jacob even more, but of course agree that the story line should (more like *would* go the way of Edward).

I think this may be the first online article illuminating the issues with Bella’s co-dependent relationship. I’m so glad you wrote this :)

lilibethJanuary 22nd, 2008 at 12:50 pm

Thanks for the comments. I’m rather new at blogging and wasn’t sure how to contact you to say thanks. This works…but I realize that the comment will be irrelevant to the discussion.

MeishaJanuary 22nd, 2008 at 1:15 pm

I haven’t read anything in the Twilight series (I’m on a “fiction strike” right now.) But after reading your thoughts on the love story, I don’t think I would like the books anyway. I HATE romance movies or stories that send a bad message, especially to teenage girls. Loni and I were actually have a similar discussion about the popular romance movie “the Notebook” the other day, and we both agreed it sent a terrible message to young girls. Kudos to you for pointing out the not so subtle message found in this “romance”.

Sarah HJanuary 22nd, 2008 at 6:56 pm

I’m glad you wrote about this. Everyone I talked to loved these books and it was hard for me to find someone to voice my concerns to. I only read the first one, and I liked the adventure. The romance bugged me. It was a little too much, and I definitely found it lustful. There was the brief mention of the ‘favorites’ game between Bella and Edward which somewhat indicated they had gotten to know each other a bit on the ‘friends’ level, but not much was said about that.

My two biggest bones to pick were:

1. Edward was more important to Bella than the well-being of Bella’s family or anybody else. When she went off to leave her father, she mentioned her concern about hurting him, but it immediately left her mind. Regarding situations with Edward, she was obsessed, but when it came to her father, she never mentioned her him again. Then she wanted to be a vampire, not caring that might cause her to kill people (ruining lives) and not caring what it would do to her parents. Edward became her life.

2. It’s really not practical. Apart from her becoming a vampire (which would be most upsetting considering the constant struggle she would have to go through to not eat people), they would have to work out the age thing. She’d become a lot older then him and then die. Although the heart is important, the head should also be a factor in relationships. The mind really wasn’t a factor at all in considering the compatibility of the two.

There are other things I do appreciate, the first being that the story isn’t full of immorality but is still a popular romance. The adventure really addicts me, too. Another good thing was watching Edward overcome his crazy impulses… he doesn’t eat Bella at the end even when he has to suck her blood. At least self-restraint was exercised. I liked to think of it as a metaphor because it was a young weak girl (who of course, did put herself into the situation with a full knowledge of what might happen) completely relying on the strength of resistance of a hormonal man (vampire) who choose a good thing. This was in fact evidence of Edward’s personality, and I’d like to hope part of Bella’s affection for Edward was based on those types of qualities he has that she discovered along the way.

Maybe Meyer is planning a surprise ending in which Edward eats Bella and teaches teenage girls to stay away from the dangerous guys. Just kidding. That would be lame. I do wonder how all these issues will be resolved at the end while hopefully teaching a good lesson of sacrifice and true caring.
If they don’t end up together, I’d be fine with it. Sometimes the strongest evidence of love is to be able to let someone go for the sake of their happiness.

SummerJanuary 22nd, 2008 at 7:13 pm

Julie - Good points, especially your last sentence, “It’s a sad message to teens about love, respect, and companionship. And any teen that thinks they can sleep together every night and not have sex is totally fooling themselves.”

Kenna - Send your mom on over. I’ve been hoping she might have something to say about this

Meisha - I’ve never seen The Notebook. Don’t know that I ever will based on your thoughts about it.

Sarah - I agree with you completely about Bella’s selfishness. It’s very true that many teenagers put their friends and romance interests before their family. But that doesn’t mean that’s ok.

SarahJanuary 22nd, 2008 at 7:36 pm

Thank you so much for writing this! I have several friends (who actually introduced me to this series) and I have noticed that my friends who adore the E/B pairing are the same ones that have made similar choices with relationships in the past. I’m not saying every E/B shipper has relationships like that, but I do think a lot of people read this book and expect that romance and marriage and love in general is supposed to be about being, as SM put, addicted to each other and about giving up everything else. I’m only 18, but I don’t believe I will ever make a decision to put one person above every other part of my life.

I think SM is going to make a cop-out, quite frankly. She’s already said that the POV of future books will be different (one rumor I’ve heard is half-Bella’s POV and half someone else’s). I think she might change the direction of the story before she would have to confront the difficulties and responsibilities as a young adult author in discussing this choice.

I really like the books and enjoyed them a lot, but it does concern me because I know so many people (and, I hate to say it, but I remember being a preteen girl and I’m certain I would have done this) who don’t distinguish between what works in fiction and what works in real life. As a novel, it’s enjoyable, and though I would prefer Bella ending up with someone like Jacob, I’ve reconciled that it will end with E/B. I just wish people wouldn’t take messages from this book like that is the only kind of love worth having.

As far as Bella herself goes, I don’t find her that annoying, just because her level of insecurity and feeling unworthy I think is something so many people go through, whether or not there’s a guy involved. What I do not like about her is that she basically decides the Cullens are amazing and seems to conclude that no one else is. The way she talks about her schoolmates actually offends me quite a lot; first co-dependent relationships are okay, then it’s okay to assume that all of your peers are shallow, superficial, cruel, and unable to take a hint? I don’t really buy when the Cullens praise Bella’s kindness; she’s one of the most judgmental characters I have ever encountered. Most teenagers actually do have personalities and brains, thank you very much.

I once thought that co-dependent relationships could work out okay as long as they had people around them who could take care of them and keep them from being self-destructive. The Cullens provide that safety net for Edward and Bella, who otherwise would have died out of their own self-loathing/pity/destructive tendencies. I now realize that a) no relationship’s success should rely on factors outside of the relationship and b) there are better ways to love and live your life.

Thank you for writing this and bravo!

BrilligJanuary 22nd, 2008 at 7:55 pm

Holy crap, girl! You must’ve touched a nerve. 32 comments??!!

I read all the books. I enjoyed all the books. I want to grow up to be Stephenie Meyer, because her books are not brilliant necessarily, but they have the whole world talking. She wrote it for teenagers, but you’ve got all the mommy bloggers weighing in here! Hahaha! Seriously. Break me off a piece of that success!

I think you have a lot of good points, and I love that you wrote this post.

KathieJanuary 22nd, 2008 at 8:35 pm

First of all, lets just say I was enthraled with these books from the start. In discussing them with someone who had never read them and trying to tell why I couldn’t put it down, I couldn’t explain it. So I have come to the conclusion that it is just very well written story that pulls you in, no matter how stupid and annoying the characters can be. I think Bella is a wonderful character, because she is a pin point of what most teenage girls are, slightly under confident and unable to comprehend that others do not see her the way she sees herself. Don’t we all suffer from this slightly? I think I can be pretty confident and I know my own self worth, but I often do not expect others to see it or recognize me. I am continually surprised when people remember me or know who I am if I have not had a lot of contact with them. Who am I to remember? Anyway, I think that makes Bella very relatable. I also understand her attention to Edward. She was never interested in the ordinary, even annoyed at what most girls would be thrilled at, being asked to the prom by 3 different guys! So of coarse it would be the out of ordinary that would attract her.
As for Edward. I have pitty for him. He can never sleep (I love sleep and sometimes it is the only thing that can clear a bad day away!), He must always hide who he is, and he can never age or die. I know a lot of people would argue on that one, but I don’t think that is a blessing. Also we think how cool it must be to read peoples minds, but how horrible a curse would it be at the same time. He could never have a normal relationship! This is the one part that I disagree with you on, although I see your point that he was only interested in Bella because he can’t read her mind, I think that is their saving grace. I think it is the only thing that gives him a chance at having a normal reationship. I was first interested in my hubby because of some very stark differences I saw in him compared to other guys. He intrigued me more than he attracted me, but that intrigue grew into respect and love. The excitement and newnest of Bella is what I believe enables Edward to love her.
However, I do agree that that their relationship developes into a not so great one. it is like they take their intrigue and mold it into obsession. Obsession is never a good thing. They both become rediculous. I just wanted to shake Bella and tell her how stupid she was! She let the heart break become her life, not even trying to come out of it. I think it showed sefishness, and even more so immaturity. And Edward was just as selfish, although I believe he was trying to keep Bella away from the horrible life he knew, he was only thinking about himself when he tried to comit suicide. So two selfish, obessive people do not make a good relationship. I also agree that they, especially Bella, let lust get in the way of forming a more normal relationship. If the motive was love and not lust, they would not wallow in the self pitty that over came them.
I have a few more things to say, but will have to finish later!

cherylJanuary 23rd, 2008 at 2:28 am

#31-
My only concern is with your second point. Of COURSE it’s not practical. Ummm, we are talking about Vampires, aren’t we?

Other than that, I get what you said. :)

Summer, I find this post very interesting. Surprisingly, I actually agree with it all. But three months ago, I would have freaked out on you. Here’s why I would have (and all my friends):

Being far removed from teenage angst, we mothers of small children (this is what matches most of my friends) indulged ourselves into a little “Edward-Candy.” We became obsessed –OBSESSED! –with this mysterious and charming vampire. We dreamed about the books, about him, about us with him. We thought about it all the time. We devoured the three books as quickly as we could. We cursed to ourselves that the fourth book was not out yet! We visited the websites, read about SM, got excited about the movie…

And then, a few weeks went by.

Now, being removed, we realize that it was JUST THAT. A fantasy that we indulged in for a little time. We think of those moments with slight shame and embarrassment. Do we get upset we read them? No, and I don’t think any of these commenters truly hated the books. But we do now see them as we see them –a girlish fantasy of vampiric proportions. :)

Anyway, I’m glad you wrote what you wrote. It makes perfect sense. And if the rumors are true, I do hope SM fixes their relationship. I truly do, because yuck, Bella better not end up with Jacob!

P.S. Summer, I would read any novel you wrote. Even if it sucked. ;)

Gramma DuckyJanuary 23rd, 2008 at 11:32 am

Talk about OBSESSED! A 30-year old woman at a retail store here had the name “Edward” tatooed on her wrist. He’s her everything. Ha

SummerJanuary 23rd, 2008 at 2:16 pm

Sarah - I really liked your point about Bella shunning humanity in general. She really never gave any of her schoolmates a chance.

Kathie - I think Bella is a wonderful character, because she is a pin point of what most teenage girls are, slightly under confident and unable to comprehend that others do not see her the way she sees herself. Don’t we all suffer from this slightly?” That’s precisely why I identified with her so much. I was very much like that as a teenager.

Cheryl - These novels are very absorbing. As I said above, I first read them without really giving them a second thought. I simply got sucked into it. But after I digested it a bit these issues began to pop out at me.

Gramma Ducky - WOW!

anordinarymomJanuary 24th, 2008 at 9:52 pm

I finally read this series and although I enjoyed them, I didn’t quite understand why everyone was so in love with these books for nearly all the reasons you mentioned.

Most excellent post … and I agree, too. Bella had more to her life when she was with Jacob.

PamJanuary 24th, 2008 at 11:41 pm

Haven’t read the books, haven’t been tempted, probably not of interest to me. I have enjoyed the dialog about the books. I also wanted to weigh in as #40

AlisaJanuary 26th, 2008 at 7:15 pm

I completely agree with you. My DH says he doesn’t see it, and maybe it’s because I’ve been through toxic and controlling relationships myself, but the whole Edward/Bella thing makes me nauseated and angry.

This is what I posted about it recently on my blog:

http://alisaterry.blogspot.com/2008/01/edward-is-voyeuristic-pedophile-and.html

MelissaJanuary 30th, 2008 at 1:24 pm

Okay - thank you so much for putting the Spoiler Alert on there… I think I’m the only person on the planet who hasn’t read these… sigh… time to give in??

CarolineJanuary 31st, 2008 at 8:43 pm

OK, so I don’t have any problem with what you are saying about the realtionship but i think you are missing the fact that the “obsessive” aspect of Bella’s love for Edward is supernatural. For goodness sake, he’s a vampire. And the fact that Meyer explained imprinting just reinforces the fact that Meyer is highlighting the fact that relationships with mythical creatures are NOT normal. I hate obsessive teenagers also but this goes beyond the petty schoolgirl crush. This is reinforced also by the fact that Edward feels the same way. Edward is like 100 years old.. i think if he could stop being obsessive than he would.. and the same goes for Bella.

Even though I believe all that I just said I want Bella to choose Jacob but I could never imagine Bella being strong enough to do it. And quite frankly, if I were her I would pick Edward also. (remember what i said about the supernatural aspect). And if you were in the situation don’t kid yourself into thinking you would DEFINATELY pick mortality. You’ll never know so don’t judge.

AnnetteFebruary 17th, 2008 at 11:10 pm

You’re spot on–and there are even more reasons the phenomenon drives me crazy. I read the first book only, and while I sped through it (she’s a smooth writer), I didn’t really enjoy it. The last section was the best because something actually happened instead of the characters sitting around talking all the time. I didn’t get the chemistry, either.

I can see how teens would love it, but I’m one of the crowd that doesn’t get why grown women swoon over it. I have a neighbor who picks up one of these books when she’s mad at her husband so she can pretend to be with Edward. Okay . . .

I sincerely hope my daughters won’t pick them up–with any luck, the craze will have passed by the time the oldest has any interest–because it’s such a horrid example of what a relationship should be.

And yeah, Bella is beyond annoying.

kilpatrickFebruary 23rd, 2008 at 5:47 pm

A friend of mine lead me to your blog as i just finished the 1st book and am waiting for the Library to get the other two in for me to check out. So, I totally agree and am happy that others feel the same. But, I had to remember once the book was over that as a teenager, I would have LOVED IT! As a 34 year old mom, I was a little creeped out. Yeah, totally co-dependent. I kept wanting to say, “Get some space guys!” But as a teenager, I would have loved to have someone totally in to me that they would never want to leave. It actually makes me really happy that I am older and wiser, but still young at heart. PS: I am SUPER excited about the movie and the Edward character. Oooooh, Eye Candy. I had a hard time figuring out what Edward looked like in my head. His face kept changing, so now it will be a nice face to think of when I read the other two. Don’t worry about spoilers. I am a read-ahead kind of girl.

SummerFebruary 23rd, 2008 at 8:06 pm

Caroline - I don’t think I passed any judgment on Bella’s decision based on immortality in my post. But I can safely say that if the price of immortality was eternal murder, I wouldn’t pick it. But I am a deeply religious person to begin with and Bella is not.

Annette - Yeah, I definitely don’t want my daughter worshiping this book when she is a teen. Maybe I’ll let her read it, but only if she’s pretty well grounded already.

kilpatrick - Yeah, I’m petty sure I wouldn’t have the same qualms with it if I was still a teen.

Thanks for your comments.

renMarch 9th, 2008 at 4:07 am

i understand everything u havesaid but i do recall how bella told jacob that she’d rather edward be ugly and not rich then it would be even.
i believe that was in eclipse when jacob was talking to bella and the blad eagle picks up the fish on first beach in La Push.
if she thought that then she must have more than just lust for edward.
its TRUE love if u ask me

MariyaApril 6th, 2008 at 8:12 pm

I agree 100%. I pray Bella ends up with Jacob. Bella and Edward don’t really love each other, I hope it’s just sort of representative of everyone’s first love and that Bella too will mature and choose Jacob.

M. BeatrizMay 5th, 2008 at 5:34 pm

In class today, we were discussing the difference between “I love you because I need you” and “I need you because I love you”. I remained slightly confused on the subject, but my bff and I looked at each other and thought the same thing: Bella.

She can’t live without him. That sounds horrible to me.

JamieMay 7th, 2008 at 5:53 pm

I’m writing a paper on the Twilight series, and was wondering: Would you mind if I used this entry as a source?

Thank you,
Jamie M G

KheyaMay 14th, 2008 at 7:56 am

the whole twilght started because she fell in love with a vampire thats basically the whole story. Bella and Edward should be together forever, Jacob is too young for Bella and certainlty not mature! I get if some people think that bella is goin to end up Jacob, in my oppinion i dont think so. BTW bella and edward r super close they love each other more than anything even though it will have to kill her!

Richelle FMay 29th, 2008 at 12:37 pm

I finally finished the 3rd book. I had this post bookmarked so I could read what you said about it. :-)
I totally agree with you! I really don’t understand why she wants to be with Edward. She’s totally obsessed which she thinks is love. She just wants his body. She thinks she can’t live without him because of what happened when he left her, but she started living normal once she was with Jacob. It doesn’t seem like she really has thought things through, she’s just obsessed.
My husband read them too, and we agreed that we are not sure we would want our teenage daughters reading it (hypothetically in the future, since we don’t have any daughters–yet :-) ) because of her relationship with him. It really is not a healthy one.

maryJune 1st, 2008 at 8:45 pm

What do you think of Romeo and Juliet? Not that Stephenie Meyer is Shakespeare, and of course times are different, but don’t you believe in true love? Is there a specific age people are suppose to fall in love? Also, from my experience love usually starts off as lust. They are young, but they have gone through a lot together. I don’t agree with everything in the books, but they are fiction. I think many couples begin with the needy, can’t get enough of each other stage, but the relationship changes and grows, and matures. Many relationships aren’t always balanced or perfect. It doesn’t mean the persons in the relationship don’t love each other. In fact, sometimes it is those times of unbalance when true love comes out.
I think we should wait until the last book comes out before we pass our final judgement. I hope Edward and Bella do end up together. Afterall, true love should prevail. I guess I’m just an enternal romantic optimist. :D

Marye~June 3rd, 2008 at 7:30 pm

As a social worker, woman and mother, I totally agree with your views of Edward and Bella’s relationship. As a hopeless romantic, I do love to read SM’s books. I hope their relationship matures, guess we’ll find out in less than 2 months.

TashyaJune 4th, 2008 at 8:03 am

All so true.

Edward and Bella do have a scary relationship that is beyond unhealthy.

TashyaJune 4th, 2008 at 3:20 pm

Also have you read chapter one from book four? It seems like the relationship witll take a healthier form.

Mrs. RomeroJune 5th, 2008 at 9:03 pm

I am actually with you on this… while I would choose Edward fro myself, if I had a daughter, she would have to end up with Jacob…And, since I know I would care more for my daughter than I do for myself, the answer has to be Jacob.

As far as the lust thing goes…when I was 17 I was definitely lustful. Those first “love” emotions are insanely strong. Part of the magic of the story is that it takes you out of the laundry room and back to a time when your whole world was yours…

I think Stephenie Meyer takse her responsibility to her teen audience seriously. Having Bella give up everything for a guy cannot be the way to go.

So, I think, somehow Bella is going to have some power to change Edward back to human.. there you go Steph, run with it.

CherokeeJune 7th, 2008 at 9:28 pm

Okay, first off I want to say that I agree with you on ALL of this…don’t think I’m just picking a fight here ;-)

I think that we are all (me included) reading into this a little too much. Yes, the relationship between Edward and Bella isn’t what it should or could be, BUT a lot of the people reading these books don’t even take it as that. The way that it was written makes it so easy for teens to understand.

EVERYONE I have ever spoken to (for more than 5 minutes) in the past has said that they have felt themselves not good enough at some point in their life — I spent many years feeling that way myself. Steph is telling teens (through Bella) that they are not alone in feeling that way! I can tell you that these books helped ME realize that! It actually helped me get over those feelings.

On the relationship aspect, teens COULD on subconscious level process this as “this kind of relationship is okay”, but a lot of the teenagers I know that are reading this aren’t smart enough to realize that, even subconsciously (no offense). It’s COMPLETELY different reading about this relationship or actually BEING in one like that. Most can tell something is wrong.

The fact that some girls are going to get into relationships with older men is inevitable. Forbidding it to happen is only going to make it worse…make it more appealing. The more you worry, the more the girl wants to get into that relationship. I’m not saying that the book didn’t have anything to do it — maybe it did — but you can’t blame it entirely on a single book series! That’s like blaming the war on a book/movie about world war 3…hello! IT JUST DOESNT WORK THAT WAY! Did you ever consider that maybe the girl LIKES the boy she’s with? Just because it isn’t love yet doesn’t mean it can’t become love.

Sure, maybe the fact tha Edward can’t read Bella’s mind had something to do with the initial attraction — but Steph herself has said that even if he COULD read her mind, it would not be different: Bella’s mind isn’t like that of girls’ her own age. He would be intrigued by that fact.

I could go on…but I think this has gotten a little long…one last thing.

If the relationship was the way you want it to be, you’d still find something wrong with it, wouldn’t you?

It’s like Miley Cyrus: If she didn’t pose topless or have all these less than Christian photos floating around the internet, I’d still find something wrong with her…just because.

By picking this series apart, you’re only making the problems you stated worse.

vaJune 10th, 2008 at 9:19 pm

hehe..i agree with you on some..that edward and bella’s relationship is really…..you know..^_^..but..i still think that bella and edward should be together cause they love ea. other a lot!!..and even though jacob does bring her to life…thyre better off as friends!!…

CrisJune 12th, 2008 at 12:37 pm

oh…I will begin by warning that i don´t speak english very well…I’m portuguese…
=)… but i would like to give my opinion about this… i think the felling between Bella and Edward is TRUE LOVE, even thinking that Edward loves Bella more than she loves him. In my opinion, Edward is a litle superproctetive about Bella, but he is that way because he really loves her, he would die for her, like Romeo does.
Don´t you think Romeo really loves Juliette??Don’t you think it’s true love.. a love for eternity… I BELIEVE!!
don’t get me wrong, but people should preserve some beliefs, some dreams. I know that it´s fiction and the real life isn’t that way, but no one sayd these books are an example to teen girls’ real life.. They are a way to learn to overcome some problems, a metaphor to real life. I’m not saying that girls should give up their own life to have someone, but what happens when that person become their reason to live. Why don´t live of and for that person if that person lives of an for us. Isn’t it a dream, Isn’t it Real love?? I think it is.And i’m only seventeen years, just like Edward. You can think i’m stupid and antiquated, but i have a boyfriend (who is mine for two years…lol….) that i love so much, and i think my life would never be the same if he goes away from my life. I love him so much, and it is not fiction or any book story. I’m dependent of him and he depends of me. I’m not saying that i would jump from a cliff if he goes away, but i certainly would act like Bella(and my life is not a fantasy book with vampires…=)…..).

Edward is a vampire, he thinks he is horrible monster. However, he loves someone, he cares about someone. how could a monster be that way. He saves Bella’s life many times, he’s so sweet with her, he only wants her good, he leaves Bella, suffering, but only because he thinks it’s the better for her. How coul you say he is selfish?? No….he could be everything less selfish.

About Bella, I identified my self with her, even thinking what he does with Jacob it’s Wrong (giving him hope while she knows that she can’t live without Edward; kissing him, without intentions to stay with him and left edward), but, who’s perfect?? NO ONE. I like Jacob, and i think, in part, she could be happy with him, but i think BELLA should end up with Edward. She really loves Edward, even when she “founds” that she also love Jacob (but not in the same way). Bella says: “i know who i can’t live without”….. She can’t live without Ed because she loves him so much. I like Bella, she’s just like me: low self-esteem, a ordinary girl, trying to live without complications, but there are so many complications that we can’t fight. I really understand Bella. Because of this all, i think Bella is a normal girl, with a normal life, that find her true love, her reason of living, Edward Cullen, and, after that, her life would never be the same.

Finally, i think we all should have a kind of magic in our lifes… It’s essencial to be really happy. But, in the other hand, we should not mix the real life with fantasy if we don’t want to be disapointed with our life, if we don’t want to stay insane in this world that, sometimes, don’t have a rest of happy fantasy.

Anyway, i liked to see a different opinion. It’s always good.

stay ok

SarahJune 19th, 2008 at 10:36 pm

I see the same problems with Edward and Bella’s relationship. However, I do not agree that being selfless is not romantic. It’s the reason they love each other. I agree with the part about them being too physically attracted and not enough attracted to each other, though. I wonder how that will change when Bella becomes a vampire… The characteristics that attract Bella to Edward will not be as potent… :ermm:

SarahJune 19th, 2008 at 10:40 pm

*Note: “… physically attracted and not enough attracted to each other.” above should be “…physically attracted and not enough attracted to each other personally.”

KatrinaJune 21st, 2008 at 8:52 pm

Hello, I got the impression that most of the comments are made by mothers. I am a 16 year old girl, about to enter Junior year in high school, and I noticed a theme while reading the comments that I wanted to address.

First of all, I do not exactly believe that the books were written extremely well and in fact, the writing was actually quite plain.

However, I disagree that the message was necessarily a bad one - one that teaches co-dependency is romantic. I think the story on a whole is quite appealing to young teenage girls because at this time in our lives we are learning about what it means to become a woman, and what type of people we are attracted to. I think that in that aspect, Stephenie Meyer hit the hammer on the nose, if you will.

Also, I think that because the story is a low-key “teenage” romance novel, it moves the imagination and I do believe that as teenage girls, we know that it is not real, and we know that real life love generally forms from something deeper than what Edward and Bella have. I still do not believe their relationship is unhealthy, I believe it is perhaps an example of what a loving relationship COULD be, given time, and really, would any woman hate to be needed and need with such a passion that her heart would break if separation were to occur?

A few mothers, I think, mentioned that they did not want their daughters reading these novels. I believe that banning books is the worst form of censorship there is. Books are for people to read and come to their own conclusion about them. Books, no matter what genre or style, are a form of free expression, as is reading them, and intelligence is gained, in any shape or form, no matter how small, from reading any book in the world.

SkyJune 23rd, 2008 at 4:24 pm

All comments have very good points, as does your post. Me, personally, I loved the books. Being a library lady, I’ll read anything I can get my hands on. I also read these books in about a day. While I’ll admit, I love Edward, it brought me back to my (ahem) unhealthy relationships in high school. I was always the person who wanted what she couldn’t have. I’d like to think I’ve grown up and am no longer like that. Sure I’d like to have Fergie’s body…but it won’t happen. Bella was (is) like that too. I totally understood her.

Skys last blog post..Pink Lemoade Giveaway!

JuneJune 29th, 2008 at 11:55 am

Thanx for articulating my exact thoughts while I was reading the books. Unfortunately I don’t think there is much Stephenie Meyer can do with the huge amount of Edward/Bella fans out there, I think they would totally threaten her life if she ended the series other than with E/B. There are some really weird people out there.
On the other hand you’re right if she needs to end it with E/B (and I think this is inevitable) she should really work on their relationship, because as it is of right now it’s all but a healthy one!
Again thanx for writing down everything I thought while reading!

LogicalRavenJuly 25th, 2008 at 5:46 pm

Amen…. I sincerely hope that she doesn’t end up with Edward. Their relationships has me screaming “RUN” at the top of my lungs.

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[...] Edward and Bella: True Love or True Lust? [...]

DollymamaJuly 29th, 2008 at 5:56 pm

I’ve read all three Twilight books and am first on the library’s reserve list for Breaking Dawn. I agree with you about the relationship between Edward and Bella. I’m a Jacob fan. So far I haven’t met a single teenage girl that thinks Jacob is worth anything. ugh

AdenaJuly 31st, 2008 at 8:19 am

wow, very insightful. I will admit I started reading this series because my teen daughter was so caught up in them I had to see what it was all about. When the whole “I’ll kill myself if I can’t have you” started happening and the depression, it bothered me. I personally have a problem with teenagers dating period and for getting married so young. at least stephanie meyer refuses to write about pre marital s*x. i personally am part of “team jacob”, as a mother, i think bella will regret not being able to become a mom and she could have that with jacob.

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LindyJuly 31st, 2008 at 8:02 pm

I love Stephenie Meyer’s ability to describe characters and emotions so clearly that we can see and feel the story. I can’t imagine parents letting their pre-teens read it because there is too much sexual tension in it - but for everyone else it’s a great love story. Wouldn’t we all love to have someone like Edward who would protect us with his life? What a great fantasy.

I normally don’t read romance novels, and some of the writing did remind me of those. But, if you don’t dissect the book and just read it, it’s a very beautiful love story.

Bella did get very tiresome by the third book with her whining and sobbing for Jacob. I love the characters of Alice, Emmett and Jasper and can’t wait to see them in the movie. Bella probably doesn’t deserve Edward. Maybe the story should have been written for an older audience, but then . . . where would you find such a rabid group of fans if not for teenage girls.

Ok . . . I loved the books and the vampires. Bella and Jacob, not so much. I’ll be sorry when the series ends. Hopefully, they’ll make all the books into movies and we won’t have to give Edward up quite yet. I’m kind of scared at what will happen in Breaking Dawn. I don’t care enough about Bella to be happy for her if she decides against staying with Edward.

BritniJuly 31st, 2008 at 10:32 pm

I’m probably one of those giggly eyed girls, but I love the relationship between Edward and Bella. Jacob actually completely annoys me. He tries to say that he’ll have a normal relationship with Bella, but that’s a lie. He’s a werewolf! I think that Edward is completely in love with Bella by the way he treats her, but not sure about Bella’s feelings. I’m gonna just go with their hopelesly in love with each other.

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jenniferAugust 2nd, 2008 at 9:37 pm

please.i happen to really like these books.i have looked at some websites,its true.some teenage girls look at edward in there heads and think, “Edward is so hot!” and “IF HE WERE REAL HE WOULD BE MINE!” it really is unreal.some people…………. well anyway,i love edward and bella TRULY! not cause he’s “hot” cause he’s sweet,funny and nice.same with bella.i highly recomend this book.

PLEASE DONT SPOIL BELLA AND EDWARD!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

jenniferAugust 2nd, 2008 at 9:39 pm

as apossed to jacob…………
well i dont think he’s right for bella.and i dont like him.no offence to people who do.i mean he MADE bella kiss him.but i have to give him props.he healed bella,and i thank him for that.i love bella as family.plus,i hate to idmit it but he would be healthier for bella.as jacob said “bella he’s like a drug for you.i would have been healthier for you not a drug,but the sun the air…..

Katy J.August 3rd, 2008 at 12:11 pm

***This contains spoilers about Breaking Dawn!!!***
I was just surfing the reviews for Breaking Dawn when I came across this. I read the first book and loved it for reasons I’m still not sure of. It was rather poorly written, the plot was flimsy and transparent AT BEST, the characters were, for the most part, very flat. But still, I enjoyed it as a guilty pleasure. (I think it must have some subliminal messages, like words hidden between words. Otherwise, how did it become so huge? It is simply -not that good-. But I liked it too - what gives?) But I digress from what I came to say. I liked where Twilight ended - unsure and unfinished. I like that in a book - it gives me the chance to finish it how I want to. But then New Moon and Eclipse came out, neither of which I have read. And then, Breaking Dawn. I heard it was the official last book, so I wanted to know about it. I didn’t buy it, of course, seeing as how I didn’t get the middle 2. All I read at the end was “Bella and Edward lived happily ever after. The end.” and I was intrigued. So I pieced the story together from the ubiquitous bad reviews I found online. What a travesty. She could have done so much more, she could have delivered a powerful message of love, strength, and sacrifice. But instead, she delivered fanservice. Bella and Edward sex for the hormonal teenagers. Violent sex for the closet masochists. A baby for the women who wanted to see Bella grow up. And a happy freaking ending for everyone. Come on! Stephenie, this series is simplistic, there’s so little that is redeeming about it! But people will keep on reading for reasons even I do not fully understand. And I do have to admit I haven’t actually read it, I just know the plot (or rather, the lack thereof, which Stephenie seems to always struggle with in the Twilight books [I got the gist of New Moon and Eclipse from reviews and friends who read them] ) so there’s a chance I’m judging unfairly. But as a feminist of sorts, I am a bit offended that all that is important in the world to Bella is Edward. She doesn’t want an education, she doesn’t want a job, nor a family, nor real life experience. Just her boyfriend. Again, come on! I won’t be reading New Moon, Eclipse, or Breaking Dawn. (or if I do, I will definitely be borrowing them because I won’t feed any money into books aimed at impressionable teenagers with messages like the joys of co-dependency. What a way to convince young girls that the only thing that can make them happy is a dangerous boyfriend.) I just hope the next modern literary phenomenon is something with a good message, like the last one, Harry Potter. (Harry Potter was a wonderful series even if the entire last book was pretty much fanservice as well, so all the shippers were happy in the end. But the core messages of the series [sacrifice, strength, overcoming fear, the power of goodness, the redeeming power of love, good triumphing over seemingly immortal evil, friendship...I could keep going.] were all positive and beautiful.)

jenniferAugust 3rd, 2008 at 2:22 pm

:heart: bella and edward have true love. somtimes i wonder if bella did’nt smell as “appealing” to edward if he would still love her. stepienie meyer needs to anser our wandering questions. if you are reading this SM i am your num.1 fan. i love the stories of edward /bella. i was praying you would out number harry potter with them. i have every one of your books. it’s funny though. i cry every time i read new moon and eclipse……..
anyway, it’s love not lust. love……….love………..love
:heart: :heart: :heart:

themotherboardAugust 11th, 2008 at 3:52 am

How did I miss this thread when you first published it?

Amen! Amen! Amen!

I totally agree with what you said. It is fluff reading… and scary fluff for teenagers. It is the antithesis of what we should be wanting our girls dating/falling in love with.

I am so glad to finally find someone else who feels the same way!

Were we twins separated at birth?

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TiffanySeptember 1st, 2008 at 9:21 pm

You summarized my thoughts perfectly. I began to get a little annoyed by Bella in New Moon and concerned about her effect on the teenage girls reading the book. Bella is completely defined by her relationship with Edward - she has no outside interests or hobbies. Even school is a bore to her, all she cares about is being with Edward and they both say they cannot live without each other. This is definitely a co-dependent, unhealthy relationship and it gets even worse in Breaking Dawn. I was disgusted by Bella’s behavior, especially considering that the book was written for young girls. As an aside, I thought Jacob’s imprinting on a newborn baby was the height of foolishness.

Even knowing all that, I still loved the series. As a married woman with a one year old and stressful job, this series was a great escape from reality. I have read the series twice now and could easily pick it up again. I just hope young girls don’t get caught up and think that their high school boyfriends are their Edwards.

CammmSeptember 12th, 2008 at 1:04 pm

I really hate this pairing, mainly because I’m a yaoi/slash fanatic and two… I cannot stand Bella. I mean, I’m not against het, but this pairing is seriously disappointing to me, so NOT worth the hype or all those million sites dedicated to them. Heck, I even like the minor pairings way better than this one. Their relationship is an illusion, and if you love someone you don’t cheat on that person, at least not when you know the other person will inevitably find out (because, ya know, he can read minds, he’s a freaking vampire!!).
I can see why people like this pair. It’s so very idealized, Meyer makes it look as if they’re perfect and destined and epic, with the forbidden and everlasting thingy. Twu wub forevah is much more attractive to giggly fangirls than a realistic portrayal of love. Anywyay, I actually “kinda-sorta” bought their connection in the first book. But when Jacob entered the picture and Bella started to have feelings for him pretty soon, I really couldn’t buy Edward and Bella’s relationship anymore. I know that many people fall in love quite easily, but if Meyer was aiming for True Love Forever and Ever, the introduction of Jacob was a slip-up (even though I really like Jacob’s character, so I wont complain too much about that). Then again, how are we supposed to believe Bella is 100% in love with Edward when she’s also in love with Jacob? That is one of the biggest problems I see with E/B, right after the first books.
I can also very much see why E/B makes people yawn. I’m pretty sleepy just hearing about it. It’s EVERYWHERE and I want more creative pair-ups. ^_^

JeannetteSeptember 22nd, 2008 at 2:07 pm

I think that it becomes more love when she becomes a vampire in the fourth book and she can now protect herself and others and is no longer co-dependent. I think the point of all the other stuff is because she is a fragile human and yes it seems sick that she’s overprotected, but when Bella can hold her own, her love is more intense for Edward and her daughter… PS Jacob would have never had Reneseme if not for Bella and Edward so this way everyone wins! I like happy endings, they’ve nearly been obliterated since people began to allow the bad guys to win.
I do totally understand what you’re saying and what you believe because i was in those high school relationships also - however who does not want to be protected? I know I can handle myself but it’s nice to know that you have someone looking out for you. Who doesn’t want to think of their teenage years and think that eventually you’ll fit in somewhere, even if it is in the supernatural world (when Bella realizes she’s good at being a vampire as opposed to the rest of her mortal life)? All in all I’d say they are good books that show us that evil is a choice, that love is a choice and it is full of compromise and sacrifice. I think they are better than a lot of teenage books that teach girls to be vindictive and fit in with the incrowd
so props to SM.

ELTOctober 5th, 2008 at 11:20 pm

“… And do you think for one moment that Edward would have taken a second glance at Bella (other than to eat her) if he had been able to read her thoughts? He was bound to be obsessed with the first girl who had the power to block him out. They are enchanted by the mystery of each other. Is this love?”

I believe that if you ever to read the draft of “Midnight Sun” (available at stephaniemeyer.com), You’ll understand better Edward’s feelings and would judge him a little less harshly.
Through his narrating, Edward always describes his admiration for Bella to be far more than the way she smells and the fact that he can’t read her thoughts. Edward always states how he’s marveled about Bella’s responses and the unbelievable selflessness she has. Something almost impossible for a girl at that age. Also, although for Bella’s own safety at first, Edward always stopped breathing when in her presence.

I truly believe the author’s intent when creating Bella was to create this character that was full of potential at life but had trouble adjusting at it. Described as an outcast, Bella struggled to fit in (not that she cared to), and when she came to this new place, she was treated different, she noted, as she had been from the place she came from. Bella had her options to whom she could lean on, the book states that much, but she chose the “different” option, the hard way, the challenging way. Meyer’s “choosing” does not mean that the author intends for young girls to opt for “strange” looking guys, but to know that decision making in life has its consequences and before deciding, you must think it thoroughly. Bella seemed to have always her decision made, however, it was the actions that Edward made that always made her keep her decision. In contrast to real life, how many parents would think badly of a guy that saved their daughter from being raped and probably killed? How many more would think badly if they knew the guy their daughter is uncontrollably sobbing for, has actually left her because is better for her safety (leaving book events aside)? More questions could raise, but you get the idea.

GinevraOctober 11th, 2008 at 12:13 am

I think Edward/Bella is overdosed with sap, there is no real chemistry, it feels more like teenage lust which turns me off, and I plainly am not a big fan. What further annoys me though is how this is supposed to be the greatest love story ever, and it feels like exaggerated obsession. Its like that simbiosis thing, or drugs, where two people would stay together even if that was unhealthy, and it annoys me that this is said to be the truest true love that’s ever touched the heart of any mortal or immortal.
It is also everywhere in the fandom. It’s pretty easy to get tired of it. And I am SO sick of all the explanations consisting of “they belong together”, “they’re soulmates”, “they’re true love forever and ever”, “they are meant to be”, … dunno, rather than reinforcing the pairing with all that, it makes me think that they think because its canon its better and superior to all others.

RenesmeeOctober 24th, 2008 at 6:02 pm

If we’re going to analyze, I’d say Bella loves neither! First of all, she has NO self esteem, and if you don’t love yourself, you can’t love someone. E/Bers are often raving that Jacob just filled the empty space of Edward, but Edward filled the empty space of her nonexistent life. It’s like, she needed a boyfriend to feel complete/happy, and that’s just sad. When I read twilight it pretty much came across as “oh here’s my life-savor, at last!”, rather than “I chose him and fell truly in love”.
All she talks about is Edward’s beauty. That’s lust.
She’s totally obsessed, that’s not love.
She thinks he’s perfect. That’s not love.
She doesn’t trust him. He repeats over and over again he loves her, and just because ONCE, he says he doesn’t, she completely believes it. She NEVER doubts that Edward may still love her. I found that really weird and ridiculous. I thought even though she felt unworthy of him, she was a little more sure of his feelings for her.
She cheats on him, that’s not love.
She’s selfish and says she wouldn’t let him go, even if he wanted to, because she can’t live without him. That’s not love, sorry.

As for bella-jacob, that was just rebound, let’s face it. Of course she’s gonna keep some feelings for him, but he was never her first choice (which is sad because Jacob is much better than Edward). In eclipse, she’s like bored of/creeped out by Edward and wants Jacob because Edward is being a prick. But that doesn’t mean she really loves Edward either, because if she did, she wouldn’t be all over Jacob, knowing it makes Edward suffer so much.
If you can toss aside an “eternal love” that easily, sorry, but all those words are cheap nonsense fluff rather than “beautiful unbreakable feelings.”
That, to me, proves that she loves NEITHER.

But this is NOT real life. This is Meyer’s world and I just accept that it’s possible to love two people and stop analyzing. Bella lives in this pink dreamlike surreal world that we must eat. It’s not possible to analyze this! Everything is messed up, because BELLA HERSELF has serious issues.

ameeraNovember 25th, 2008 at 12:25 am

I read your blog with interest and I think you make some good points but I think you missed one big thing.

It’s not only Bella and Edward’s relationship that’s codependent, it’s Bella that’s codependent. It’s Edward that’s codependent. It’s Jacob, too.

Think about it, everyone is running around thinking that another person is going to make them feel whole. They are totally lacking in genuine self-esteem, have no healthy boundaries and lack self-preservation.

Jacob is a glutton for punishment, loving someone who will not return his love — bordering on abusive in his lack of boundaries and single mindedness to get Bella to love him. When he forced her to kiss him and thought nothing of it I thought to myself, oh, oh, big reg flag.

Bella used Jacob to survive when Edward was gone and dumped him w/o a thought when Edward came back. Her desire to keep Jake as a friend and have Edward, too (have her cake and eat it too) is unrealistic, selfish and childish. If she really loved him, as she said, she’d not used him in the first place — she’d let him go and find love with someone who can return it.

I find that Edward is the most mature of the three. Leaving Bella was a selfless act, and he does try to put her needs first above his own. But he is controlling and domineering in his own charming way.

Bella is the one I have the most problem with. Is this a role model for young teen-aged girls. Say it isn’t so!!!

She has absolutely no self-self esteem and severe abandonment and rejection issues. I took this in stride in the first three books, hoping to see her grow into her own, learn some life lessons and get a back bone.

Never happened. By the end of book three, she was just as needy, insecure and passively manipulative as she’d ever been.

But to be fair, she didn’t have exactly the most adult parents. The roles were reversed, with her taking care of them so of course she turned out co-dependent.

The way Meyers writes the book so unabashedly laced with that unhealthy love makes me feel that she must be codependent herself.

I love a good romance story, but in the my favorites, the heroine is strong willed and loves herself completely. The man has to prove himself to HER — woman like these become MY heroines.

On a side note, I got a good chance to talk to my daughter about all of this, she’s 14 and got a good head on her shoulder. Spotted Bella’s codependency a mile away!

AshlieDecember 7th, 2008 at 7:10 pm

Well I agree that Bella is whiny. But it is True Love not True Lust. In the books Stephenie Meyer’s explains it so well and she shows what true passion is and you people may think it’s Lust but Edward didn’t love her at first, Midnight Sun explains, after awhile he ralized how beautiful she was and that she was what he had been looking for since he was born. And the Cullens don’t smother her, she is a magnet for danger so they are just trying to protect her. And lastly I really disagree with this If she did end up with Jacob the love would never sum up to the love she had for Edward, because you never get over your first love. So that is why Edward and Bella have True Love :heart:
Ashlies last blog post..Order - I can almost taste it

StarheartDecember 8th, 2008 at 9:28 pm

Okay, don’t get mad, because you said it yourself. But I’d still kinda like to kick you. Not nearly as much as I’d like to kick one of my friends, though, because she thinks Edward in so annoyingly perfect, and that Bella should’ve chosen Jacob instead. :sick:

But I do think you’re wrong. It IS true love, not lust. If he din’t truly love her, he wouldn’t have gone off to the Volturi in the second book when he thought she was dead in the first place! And he would pay ANY price to be human for her. He stayed with her during the fight when Jacob wouldn’t have. Stephanie Meyer explains very well all throughout the series of how much Edward and Bell truly love each other. It IS love. And if you read the partial draft of Midnight Sun on Stephenie Meyer’s website, then you’ll see how much he really does love her. She’s not being smothered, he just doesn’t want her to get hurt, especially since she is a victim to her own dangerous bad luck. He only doesn’t want her to get hurt/killed. :wub:

I’m also quite perceptive and I have a knack for noticing spelling errors and grammer mistakes, even though I’m very, well, young. I’m not a teenager yet, but I can relate to Bella on so many levels, since I am more mature than others my age. Plus, Bella really does think like a teenager, which is really cool, since Stephenie is not a teenager herself.

Okay, I just read some of the comments you’ve gotten, Summer, and I’m sorry, but I HAVE to say this: What IS it with all you mothers out there who want to control your daughter’s lives just to “protect” them! In my opinion, THAT is being smothered. MY mom lets me read what ever I want to read. I have a pre-college reading level, but I’ve always been allowed to read most things that I want. Of course, I’m sure she would probably flip out if I wanted to read Stephen King’s books, but I don’t like horror stories, and I’m a pretty good judge on knowing whether or not I’ll like the book based on the summary. But back to my point, take a look at this: I’ve already read all four books quite a few times, and I’ve read the fourth one 5. I’m not scarred for life, my parents did not prohibit me from reading them, I’m not dating anyone, I don’t have a crush on anyone, all my friends’ parents are letting them read them, and look at us. We’re perfectly fine. Well, actually, I’m the only one who DOESN’T like a guy at the moment, but I haven’t since April, and I don’t really appeal to the idea of getting my heart broken over some guy. I mean, technically, I’m still a kid, even if my mind has matured and is still maturing well beyond my years. But if I did get wrapped up in all the boyfriend-girlfriend nonsense that most of the percentage of my age group is, I don’t think I would be very happy. Don’t get me wrong, I’ll admit I’ve almost always had a crush on some one since I was in the second grade. But last year, around Valentine’s Day, something happened to one of my friends that really made me stop and think about whether I really wanted to get hurt over some boy. I was already hating Valentine’s Day: I have since my own little incident happened in the fourth grade. But that made it final. What happened to her was very similar to what happened to me, and I don’t enjoy any reminders, since I still remember all the humiliation. I finally got my head out of the clouds (the clouds where crushing over boys exist) in April, and honestly, I’ve been better off since. Happier, anyway. All of my friends don’t understand how I do it, but I’m just sick and tired of all the boy drama, and crushing, and stuff like that. Oh, I know I’ll go back to it all some day, and my parents say that me not liking anyone will change once I hit those teenage years, but I still think I can prove them wrong. Prove them that not all teenage girls have to be giddy, infatuated, hormone-ruled girls. My goal is not to be, and to be honest, I seriously think I can. I know that the whole world would be totally willing to take up a bet on that, and maybe they’re right. But they might be wrong, too. We’ll see. My parents will at least. But my point is: To all those mothers out there, I know you want to protect your daughters from any way, shape, or form of harm, but all it’s really going to do is push them away from you. And no, I did not get that from some psycology book. Blech. I read a lot, but I’m going to be a writer, not a psycologist. If they want to read romance, then let them. And please, oh please, oh please, DO NOT feel like you have to read what they’re going to read before they read it to make sure that it’s “age-appropriate”. Thank the Lord that my mom doesn’t do that. Thank the Lord that my mom doesn’t care what I read, as long as it’s not going to scare the living daylights out of me. I pretty much have free reign when it comes to what I want to read. I’m allowed to read most adult books, in fact. So even if you feel the need to protect them from things, don’t be so over-controlling! All it does when you be control-freaks is put a lot of strain on the relationship. I’ll admit that it probably is a good idea to keep the boys off your front door, and to keep them from partying, but be subtle about it. At least make it clear that you trust them, you just don’t trust the boys. Because I agree with you there. I don’t trust the boys, either, even if all they’re after right now is, well, I don’t even know. I just don’t get the POINT in the “relationships” girls and guys my age have. Ever since I figured out to just leave the crushing alone till I’m a mature adult who can take care of herself, I really don’t get the point in all this drama all around me. I mean, it’s not like the “relationship” usually lasts for more than a week. Only 1 couple out of the hundreds that have been since fourth grade when all the “dating” nonsense started has actually lasted all this time. They’re the only ones who have been together all this time without ever breaking up. Never.

Anyway, back to the Twilight descussion, I really do think that Bella and Edward love each other. It is love and not lust. If he could read her mind, then he would realize how good she is. And I don’t understand why y’all get so irritated with Bella and Edward. They don’t irritate me. The only one of my friends who does get irritated by them is Maddie, and she isn’t really all that sane at the moment *cough, hence the boy drama, cough*. Even though you guys say that you can understand why teens like them, but not grown ladies, well, look at it this way. And ask yourself a question. Are you open-minded to things? Or do you have a one-tracked mind? I read a few adult books, and I’ve turned out better than any of my friends mature wise, and I’m kinder than any of them. I treat all of my friends better than they treat me. I may be opinionated about some things, but I’m very open-minded. I don’t want to turn into one of those adults who thinks that they’re always right and everybody else is wrong, and children should not be listened to. Well, I may be an almost a teen, so you may count me with the giddy teens who love this series, but do I actually SOUND like a teen yet? No one who knows me thinks I do yet. Hopefully, though, that “yet” will be a never. I don’t want to be a whiny teenager - ugh. My older, teenage brother is already easy to make angry, and he thinks he’s always right. I don’t want to be like that, only whiny. Thank goodness he isn’t whiny. So I really disagree with you over the whole “they don’t really love each other, it’s only infatuation” thing. Even if I believed that, even if I hated the series as much as you guys seem to dislike the books, you can’t deny the undeniable truth: The Twilight Saga is not as horrible as y’all say it is. Look al around and at the charts across America. The books are all bestsellers. Billions of people have bought, read, and love them. They aren’t horrible like you people say they are. Plus, I don’t think they have a co-dependent relationship going on. And, finally, I hate Jacob Black. Hate him. Sorry, but I do. Well, that’s all I have to say, so, see ya! :cheerful:

Edward and Bella 4ever,
starheart, :smile:

redspyderDecember 8th, 2008 at 9:55 pm

Why would you say that. I understand that there is more than one opinion and every writer has their critic and I do agree that something of the parts in the book are indeed very lustful but as a guy I have a fairly good idea of how Edward feels about Bella. As a girl I’m sure that you can mostly understand the way Bella feels and thinks. I can only understand parts, but from what I gathered from what I do get that she does indeed truly love Edward and that Edward feels the same way about her. Now this coming from a guy you might say that it is false because guys are insensitive and ignorant to the way relationships feel. I agree that some guys are like that considering a know a couple and I don’t care if you want to be stereotypical and denounce everything I’ve wrote but no matter what it still doesn’t change the fact that people will still buy the books and that it is a great book.

redspyders last blog post..Storms a Brewin’

StarheartDecember 8th, 2008 at 10:09 pm

Also, my brother read the series a few months before me, and he likes them, too. Not as much as me, seeing as Stephenie Meyer is my favorite author, and the Twilight Saga books are the best ones I’ve ever read. Okay, I’m done. :lol:
Starhearts last blog post..Storms a Brewin’

SummerDecember 8th, 2008 at 10:21 pm

Redspyder,
I know Bella says she loves Edward but I don’t believe she really knows what love is and that’s mostly because according to her, her feelings are based on nothing more than fascination, danger and his astonishing beauty.

StarheartDecember 9th, 2008 at 8:39 am

But she sees his beauty inside and out. Yes, she is fascinated, but with good cause. He is… well, he’s amazing in every way possible, but she knows their limitations together, and that he has to be extremely careful with her or else he could crush her skull merely by accident. I still think that they love each other, although y’all say that they don’t it’s just lust. Well, I say that it’s just love.

Bella & Edward 4ever :heart:
starheart

Starhearts last blog post..Early Morning Ruckus

nelliebellDecember 16th, 2008 at 9:36 pm

i disagree, especially about the part that Bella should end up with Jacob..Are you kidding me? She was willing to give up her entire existance just to be with Edward..And he was willing to do the same to be with her..If that isnt love, what is? Every girl in the world only dreams of a relationship like this

SamDecember 26th, 2008 at 8:42 am

I read this and thought it was great. Ive been preaching against Twilight for awhile. Gotten a lot of negative feedback…but I think its better that the messages twilight (and many stories like it) delivers be shown for what they truly are. As a sixteen year old male not many older females take my opinion for anything other than immature jealousy. I dont get discouraged personally, but for them. At such an age they should be able to reason without that ignorance that we find in many of the young girls who read the book. Being through an eight month long relationship of what I thought to be love and what was a very co-dependent relationship I can understand completely why this book is so bad for teenage girls. For one, I dont want to run across another girl with the same dating habits as the one before. Two, I definitely do not want to deal with it in the future as dating becomes more serious. Such obsessive compulsive habits as this do not easily cease to take dominance in our lives. And its almost as if once you cling to one person, even when theyre not there to cling on you take the next person you can and cling even harder. And each time youre forced to let go it hurts even more. Mothers, fathers, is that something you want your daughters and sons, as both will be affected if in such a relationship, to deal with in their life times? My mom had to watch me do many stupids things in which I wont get into since Im ashamed of them. But it hurt her. Just as it will you if things get out of hand. Im sure my situation was a bit worse than most cases. But its still in the realm of possibility none the less. And not to far from the center of it either. “Love” stories and messages of what love is isnt only found in the Twilight series, but in so many stories today. Watching shows with cussing is heavily looked down upon by parents. But stories with subliminal messages with the potential to deeply and negatively impact your childrens love life and lifestyle in general or ok? Seems like priorities need to be straightened out a bit. Maybe Im not exactly qualified to be giving parental advice seeing as I have not even the years of life experience parents do, but Id like to think what I say still has value to it. And that people will not see my age as something to give invalidity to my opinion. I find it strange how people can say its sweet to have someone watching over you in your bed. Most girls I know would find that creepy. The way I see it is like this. Before twilight-guy watching you sleep is creepy. After twilight-guy watching you as you sleep is so sweet. Where my dream guy? My point is that any ounce of logic could tell you just because something is pathetically desperate doesnt make it romantic. Like to need control and assurance about someone so badly that you watch them sleep, or never let them out of your site, or that you would kill yourself in an attempt to gain control over the person because you lost it and so badly need it back. Yes thats why Edward was gonna kill himself. Why else? He cared for her right? Maybe, but thats a bad way to go about showing it. Go tell your loved one youre gonna kill yourself over something, watch how terrified they get, then tell me thats a perfectly acceptable option. He wanted to control her decision so he scared her into letting him have control of the situation. Abusiveness in his desperation for his own selfish desires. He should understand that Bella has a mind of her own and is capable of making her own decisions. (Some would argue against that. Hehe.) The matter of Edward leaving is complicated. Ill try to be brief. He left to protect her but it was foolish since it only hurt her more. Sure by leaving their catastrophe of a relationship it was helping them both, but it was also making it worse for them in the short term. SM should not have done this because its just more confusion for the young impressionable minds. He came back realizing it was doing no good to be gone. Well, by coming back you have just opened the many doors of possibility for even more pain and confusion. Its like a band-aid. Edward chose to rip it off fast and get it over with. But only to put another back on..and for what? Maybe the wound (Bella) wasnt quite healed, but putting another band-aid on wont help. Its beyond that point by now. SM youre a brilliant author..in the horror category. Youve created a monster, no not the excuse for a vampire, but the bond youve created that holds these characters together, slowly getting tighter as the books go on. Slowly perverting the mind of every teen who reads them. In each instance where Edward or Bella have been accused of a certain action, of course they had no choice in the matter since they are only fictional works of…”art,” although it may help put it into perspective for the ones who obsess over them and need to stop, it all needs to be recognized as SMs terrible contribution to the world. As if its not going downhill fast enough SM? I only wish she had daughters so that one day she would be forced to regret ever laying pen to paper for this diabolical mess of paper and bindings she calls literature. Also a more specific note on the literature itself, its a very easy read. I hope that her sons have run ins with girls like Bella. Maybe a terrible thing to wish upon someone. But I would love to one day have her openly resent the messages her books give out. Sorry for such a long post. I thought maybe I should get my own blog since this is so long yet so very brief really. Tell me what you think. And please feel free to comment on this post people.

Sams last blog post..Merry Christmas!

TwinkyDecember 28th, 2008 at 11:22 pm

I keep trying to convince people in my school that Edward and Bella’s love is just lust. Of course, the die-hard Edward fans ignore everything i say about it. -_-
You’re totally right about the Edward/Bella thing. I used to be a fan of Twilight. By the end of the fourth book (with the upsetting and flat climax) I was wavering a bit. Then, I went to see the movie, and all the visuals i had were crushed. I stopped being a Twilight fan. Out of my sadness, I picked up Harry Potter again.
Now I’m a die-hard Harry Potter fan girl :D

Great Article!

ChinaJanuary 2nd, 2009 at 2:47 pm

you see i don’t care if it’s lust or love its just that i hate them as a pairing and its really annoying to see them everywhere. i’m not telling e/b’ers to stop, but i have all the right i want to say that i despise Edward and Bella as a paring.
They have zero sparks between each other and are boring as hell. No chemistry! No passion! If a couple has no chemistry or passion, what’s even the point of hooking them up? Tsk, tsk, Rotten-Meyer!xD

I’m happy the movie solified my theory =)
Bella and Edward are the most boring popular pairing I have ever read about=S. i’m serious. i found every other pairing in the series more fun to read and i’m honestly curious as to what is the appeal here. i thought they sucked in every possible level lol. except for the lulz of the cheese, but not just ed/bella, jake/bella too. and jake/renesmee? gosh. “it was only her what tied me to the floor” ahahaha

whatevs.

(L) YUKI&SHUICHI :heart:
FOREVER (L) :heart:

Then that’s a beautiful, entertaining, heartfelt, heartstringy
F’ed UP relationship. :wub:

Chinas last blog post..My first Wedding Cake

starheartJanuary 3rd, 2009 at 5:04 am

Gee! Okay, if China had read any farther, down near the bottom of the page, Summer asked everybody to please keep the comments nice and clean. I hate cussing! I mean, I hear it enough at school, unfortunately I hear it every day at my house, and the internet used to be the only place where I didn’t hear it! I mean, of course I knew it was there, I just decided not to put myself in that element. My point: I hate hearing cuss-words. And when parents do it, it sets a bad example for your kids. Trust me. I would know.

Also, I’m beginning to wonder if this is a Hate-E/B fan club. I’ve heard, what, maybe 4 nice comments TOTAL on their relationship not including mine? (See a few comments above.)

I still love the book series. I’ll admit that a few of the messages that she gives out aren’t exactly the messages you want to be giving out to teenagers and the few pre-teens (like me) who read the books, but hopefully that’s not going to do a whole lot of damage to kids’ minds. I turned out okay, and I’ve read the whole series more than three times! If more than three times hasn’t done any damage to me and my friends who are younger than me, I think that the world’s population of kids will be okay. (Though I am a bit more mature than most kids my age……. hmm………)

Okay, let me rethink my opinion: it just changed. If it’s your average teenager reading them, then it probably will give aff a few bad ideas, such as having your new girl or boyfreind in the same bed at night. As one of the people who commented before me said, “Any teen who thinks that they can sleep in the same bed with someone else every night and not have sex is just fooling themselves.” Or it was something like that, anyway. I do agree with that. I may not be a teen yet, but I go to church and we have a youth group. I have seen PDA(Public Displays of Affection) before. Now if kids will go out and do stuff like kiss and hold hands in public, I don’t even want to think about what they do behind closed-doors.

And Sam, I find it VERY insulting that you think that Stephenie Meyer is “slowly perverting the minds of teens”. Ah-hem??? I do think that being in her bed at night is a little much, but still? Is it really so necessary to insult every teen/pre-teen who has read the books and enjoys them??? And there ARE ways to make your point without insulting people, you know. (Some of which I’m still trying to learn, but at least I’m trying.) Plus, it is REALLY bad to wish ill on other people because things have a way of working out to where it’s YOU who ends up with whatever you wished upon someone else.

I still think that it’s love and not lust. And Stephenie Meyer wrote over and over again that they were in love, one way or another. She IS the author of the series. SHE knows whether or not they’re in love because SHE wrote it! So all you people who don’t like the books and say that they aren’t actually in love, well, she sort of DID write that they were. She wrote it, not you, and if she says they’re in love (and she did) , then they’ve got to be. I hate to burst your bubble, but if you’re stubborn and there’s no changing your mind, then I guess that’s just that.

And to prove my opinion that have not been “damaged” because I read the book, I’ll tell you a few facts of what I think.

#1. I’m pretty positive that I’ve never going to fall in love or get married, or have kids.

#2. I have no interest whatsoever in having sex. (Now this may change in a few years time, but I’m really thinking and hoping in won’t.) It’s just wrong if you’re not married, and to be honest, if you’re not going to have the kid, then there’s no point in just doing just to do it. Back in the olden days, there was no such thing as birth-control. If you decided to make that life-altering decision, then that was it. There was no going back, or just taking a pill so you wouldn’t have a kid. It was a done deal.

#3. I have no interest whatsoever in getting into a relationship like so many of the girls and guys my age are. I have a friend and I guess you could say her boyfriend is my friend too, and they’re convinced that they’re “in love” with one another. No they’re not. It’s called infatuation, thank you very much. And I have another friend who is convinced that’s she’s in love with this other guy, and he isn’t even interested in having a relationship yet. Plus, thanks to our other friends (I was the only one who didn’t say a word to him about it) , he now knows that she has this massive crush/obsession on him. Anyway, it’s pointless to get in a “relationship” when it’s not like you’re going to be together in a few weeks. I’m happy for my friend who’s got a boyfriend, but I so would not want to be her. I like being the girl who is considered smart, though luckily she doesn’t look nerdy. I like not being asked out because it just would give me stress, and too much stress builds up, and then what do you know? You’ve got a break-out. I have seen it happen.

#4. I like to observe. All around me, I see kids going out with each other. Now you would think that this would make me want a boyfriend, but it doesn’t. Because also all around me, I see kids breaking up. So to me the message is this: “Why in the world would I want to INVITE heartbreak into my life? That is just not the kind of thing I want to do.” So what, I end up shying back into the shadows, building up a wall around me, and fading into the background. I like who I am, and I don’t need anybody, such as a boyfriend for instance, to tell me who I need to be, or who I should be. I am who I am, and I will be who I want to be. And if you don’t like who I am, then that’s too bad. If you think that you’re going to hurt my feelings, well, you can say hello to the wall I have built up around me. It will protect me, and I will stand up for what I believe in. The day I turn eighteen (which seems like a long time away, but really it isn’t), I can proudly say “Hello America, here I come”. And I will be who I will be.

I believe that the Twilight Saga is a great series. There are a few things that could use a bit of improvement, but all in all they’re exellent reads.

And parents, I will suggest this one last thing: Raise your children in a curse free household. My mom SAYS she doesn’t allow that kind of language in her house, but then she breaks her own rule, so I really have no clue what she believes in. My dad rarely does, and my brother is a teenager, so I hear a few words from him. Therefore, I’m pretty much the only person in my house who doesn’t cuss. Have you ever listened to someone curse? If you have, then I’d think that you’d know it doesn’t sound pretty coming from ANYBODY’s mouth, nor does it look pretty on paper. I don’t care if it’s a word, there are better words, and you ALWAYS have a choice. Always. There always has to be some other way to express yourself or get through some phase you’re going through.

Sorry my comment was so long. I’m just saying what’s on my mind. Thanks for listening! Bye! ~starheart:smile:

starheartJanuary 4th, 2009 at 5:50 am

Although, I WILL admit that I hated the movie. He didn’t say “I love you” once in that entire stinking movie. Not once. And I watched it twice, just to make sure. I don’t like many movies anymore. I’m sorry, but the books are 99% of the time always better than the movies. Aquamarine’s movie is SO much better than the book. The book is totally lame. So, so, so lame. Well, see ya.

~starheart :happy:
starhearts last blog post..My first Wedding Cake

KatiaJanuary 5th, 2009 at 4:14 pm

Personally, I Loved The Books.
I do think that Edward and the Cullens were overprotective, but who wouldn’t when there are vampires after her, especially when they want her to join their family.
I thought that the way it was written was quite amazing. I finished each book within a day and i can’t believe how stuck into them I got.
I think that they must be in love for the way she felt about Edward when he was gone in New Moon. It showed how much she was attached to him. Yes because she is a teenager, she will have those feelings of lust to someone like him, but it is clear she really did love him by the way it affected her.
I was pleased when she got her feeling out to Jacob, in Eclipse, but it wasn’t the same. It was forced upon her. To save him. He was that much of a friend to her, she wanted him to live.
Overall I think that these books were overwhelming :cheerful:
Why would Stephanie write about love if it was only about lust?
She didn’t intend it to come across as that, that’s what I think. :lol:

ClaireJanuary 5th, 2009 at 4:56 pm

Hmm…i never thought of it that way. I defiently see what your saying but i feel like maybe it wasn’t put out to seem that way. I noever felt that Edward was forcing her, rather that trying yo protect her, because she insisted on being with him. Howevery I defiently see how there could be mixed opinions on that topic. Thanks for your thoughts, these are mine. I feel that Edward is in love with Bella, and she with him. Althought he may be controlling at times, i dont think he means to be. Some how i feel that although Edward may have his flaws, the whole thing is generaly innocent…..
thanks!!! :cheerful:
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MelanieJanuary 5th, 2009 at 11:49 pm

I absolutely agree with every single point you made. I’ve never been an Edward fan because I think he’s extremely creepy/needy. He’s constantly by her side and won’t let her do things. BUT I do have to say that the movie made me like Edward a lot more.

:)

-Melanie

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JoannaJanuary 6th, 2009 at 2:18 pm

i understand your point of view and how it feels like lust, but i think it is actualy true love.
I am a huge fan of the books, and the movie. And i think by making bella very plain and not fake or plastic - like most of the girls who have boys chasing them - it shows that you can just be yourself and wait for the right boy to come. Edward loves Bella for who she is, he loves her clumsyness, her determination, he loves her. And she loves him back.
I also think that by making edward old fashioned and not like the teenage boys with hoodies today. It makes him very romantic, caring, and a gentlmen. (:
& i don’t think the cullens are over protective, i think they have to protect her from James and the others. Bella is strong too and i don’t think he is controlling, he just can’t live without her.. as he says in new moon :

“Before you, Bella, my life was like a moonless night. Very dark, but there were stars –points of light and reason….And then you shot across my sky like a meteor. Suddenly everything was on fire; there was brilliancy, there was beauty. When you were gone, when the meteor had fallen over the horizon, everything went black. nothing had changed, but my eyes were blinded by light. I couldn’t see the stars anymore. And there was no more reason for anything.”

True love. :heart:

Ps, I see how some people think Jacob +Bella are better, but its Edward thet Bella can’t keep away from. She loves Jacob, but as a friend. Bella and Edward are in love.
(team edward) :biggrin:

leendaluuJanuary 23rd, 2009 at 4:43 pm

I’m so with you on the co-dependent relationship. I loved the first book but as I made my way through the 2nd, 3rd and 4th, I became more and more disenchanted. It took me two days to read the first book; it took me two weeks to read the last 100 pages of the 4th. The final page simply said: The End. Amen to that.

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claireJanuary 26th, 2009 at 2:45 pm

:w00t: :blush: :tongue: stephenie meyer i believe once said she did NOT write the twilight series for anyone but herself. so she was not trying to influence young girls or women to fall in love with someone dangerous or archangel beautiful. i can strongly assure you all that there are other novels almost based on the same kind of illicit passion and romance, it’s just that twilight became a world wide best seller, and gradually the propaganda made people buy it. there is something very romantically dark about edward and bella’s love, but like shakespeare’s play ‘a midsummers night dream’ he quoted ‘ the course of true love never did run smooth’. get it? besides twilight is the story of bella swan, and her strong love for edward, despite him being a 108 year old vampire. bella loves edward more then just his prize of beauty, anyone that has really read the novels and payed attention- instead of only thinking you’ll be popular for being seen in school reading it- would understand that it’s not some teen infatuation. fan girls, please stop searching to get into bella swan’s shoes, it is her story. NOT YOURS. people today are so immature, just remember love does exist and it can be beautiful but there are some worth beating obstacles you have to overcome. stephenie meyer is a very imaginative person that had the strong mind to wake up from her dream and say ‘what if,’ she probably had no idea people would end up dreaming about this book they way it probably haunted her while she was creating the characters names and personalities. thank you. kudos to the real twilight fans, not just some stupid wannabee’s running their mouths about things that will never be. or shall i say EDWARD CULLEN WOULD NEVER LOVE YOU. (chuckle….chuckle)

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samJanuary 28th, 2009 at 4:23 pm

“She wrote it, not you, and if she says they’re in love (and she did) , then they’ve got to be. ”
Someone posted this above. And Ive heard this A LOT. But the book says theyre in love, so they have to be. No. The author could easily have confusion or simply no idea at all about what real love is. As many people today dont. Its not an impossibility. Not to mention, a teen directed movie is no different than hollywood. They all use the same techniques. Hollywood makes love out of nothing, Twilight makes love out of nothing. Funny thing is, only very few cases could actually past the test of even being considered to be ACTUAL love. That doesnt mean its something you assume to be love. That means it actually is a real symbol of love. Twilight does not show this. Possibly a movie like “The Notebook” would better. Im not a huge fan being that I am a 16 year old male, but Ive seen it a few times and I know that the main male character (cant recall a name) is nothing like Edward. the love story, whether its love or lust, is no where near that of the one between Edward and Bella. In fact after looking at the two side by side it becomes even more clear to me how Edward and Bella are NOT in love. Do this yourself if you are a die hard fan. And especially if youre a teenage girl Chances are youve watched and loved “The Notebook” and provided youre not so closed minded as to deny it, you will admit it. Twilight contains no love in the series of books I call, high quality toilet paper with funnys to read before you wipe. Feel free to comment on this. :sideways:

CatFebruary 2nd, 2009 at 11:55 am

I couldn’t agree more with you!!! I saw the film before I read the books, and I loved the film and even the first book. But then I started to get frustrated about their relationship. Bella and Edward seem to be constantly arguing and disagreeing, and Edward is too protective of her. He is constantly calling her “Bella, my love”, “Bella, my darling” and tells her what to do and with whom. He is always telling her that she needs to be careful and stay out of trouble, as if she was a clumsy child that needs to be chastised by a loving but dominating father. I am sure they love each other in a very special way (in the film, Edward tells Bella she has no idea how long he has waited for her, and it is obvious that Bella has always been an outsider who found it difficult to fit in and make friends. She seems so much more mature and her classmates).

But I think hers and Edward’s relationship turns almost abusive when she keeps telling him that she cannot live without him and he keeps telling her that she has to be careful and that he could be a potential danger to her…although he keeps coming to see her every night. He makes her depend on him until she is completely lost and helpless without his guidance. And, as you rightly point out, the few times she does something on her own she worries about Edward’s reaction.

Although I’ve read all the books to find out what happens, I have to say that I think things deteriorated after the first book. Bella has no life on her own, she gives everything up to spend all her time with Edward and his family. She does not see her friends from school anymore, she does not want to anything that does not involve the Cullens. She keeps telling Edward that she wants to be changed into a vampire, and even seems eager to give up her life as a human as soon as possible. She does not even consider other options that are available to her.

I also ended up being rather tired of Edward constantly telling Bella that she should not trust him unconditionally, while at the same time never giving her enough space to allow her to have human friends and hobbies.

So, although the film and the first book are GREAT, I do agree with you that their relationship is not an entirely healthy one.

anaFebruary 7th, 2009 at 11:17 pm

I know right :angel: :sideways: :w00t: :wub:

Leroy DaleMarch 16th, 2009 at 4:54 pm

Her parents are pedophile enablers, or child pimps; however you want to spin it.

LeanneMarch 21st, 2009 at 3:15 pm

Hoo boy, you wrote in this post exactly what I was thinking when I blogged the other day about how creepy their relationship really is! I admit, I kinda enjoyed the books at first as well, though the mild feminist in me was still fairly appalled. I wasn’t so freaked out about their relationship until I realized a lot of my friends- grown women- as well as the teens I know were really convinced that their relationship is the perfect example of true love.

As a married woman, I just think that it’s not true love if you can’t be less than perfect around each other and aren’t whole people without each other. The equation in a relationship shouldn’t be .5 of a person + .5 of a person = 1 whole person, it should be 1 whole person + 1 whole person = 1 healthy, well balanced relationship!

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HannahMarch 27th, 2009 at 8:32 pm

Thank you Jennifer!
These books are amazing.
I love the books. They are the best books I have ever read!
Love not Lust.
If Edward didn’t love her, would he have spent the time he was gone tracking Victoria so she wouldn’t kill Bella? Would he have come back? Would he marry Bella? Would he have controlled his blood-thirst for her and put his love for her first? Would he have had a child with her? No!
Bella and Edward are in love, though they do have lust, too.
:)
Go Bella and Edward!!! <3 :heart:

jenniferMarch 30th, 2009 at 6:21 pm

Hee, Hee. :tongue:
That was my little sister on the on before this. She is obsessed with twilight and those other books she mentioned. They arn’t better than twilight. What is? Probally nothing comes close. I still belive it’s love. I took her to the movies to see twilight. I thought it was okay. I wish I could delete it. :unsure: Does any one on here know how? Tell me if you do.
Thx! *LOVE*LOVE*LOVE* :wub:
(Hannah, I do agree with you! So does my little sis!)
I :heart: EDWARD AND BELLA!!

twilightloverApril 6th, 2009 at 4:56 pm

I LOVE Bella and Edward! And I think that the books are RELLY COOL they RULE!!!!!!! So you shode read them I LOVE them it is a RELLY good sieres and I can not wait till the movies come out!!! :wub: :heart: :wub:

lacyApril 19th, 2009 at 12:28 am

ok i love twilight and yeah. bella bugs me sometimes too but i think that she should stay with edward beacuse they help each other so much and i think that they really do love each other.
things try to pull them apart but in the end they never give up on each other no matter how hard it is.

AnnaApril 22nd, 2009 at 1:28 pm

I ended up thinking: “OK, so I can understand why Bella is attracted to Edward; he is gorgeous, talented, mysterious and sexy! But what does he see in HER?! She is described as ordinary and clumsy and she seems to have no interests or talents of her own. So why is Edward so fascinated by her?!

k_manApril 30th, 2009 at 9:19 am

are u people stupid edward and bella should be together not bella and jacob. bella is not dumb and edwards family is not controlling her cause bella is inlove with edward. bella does not lust edward she is to much inlove to lust over him. when edward and bella get married they will know that they always be together. it’s alright for bella to date edward on the spot.:devil: :heart: :angel:

TwilighterMay 9th, 2009 at 12:36 pm

I disagree completley with what you posted.I belive that bella and edward share much more than lust,edward stated so him self he said that he will never forgive him self for leaving that he will be there for ever untill she orders him away and that his heart will always belong to her that his family is her family and that he will always LOVE her never did i hear LUST jacob is to self confident beliving that the cullens will kill bella when really he can so too… And jacob thretened to kill edward for being with bella jacob as light hearted and humorous as can be will never really be in love with bella and will never respect bellas wishes for example edward said her wish is his command and so bella wished for edward to have sex with her her in esme island and so he did. LOVE or stupid non true lust… :wub: love it is :heart: :heart:

TwilighterMay 9th, 2009 at 12:38 pm

:pinch:

RuthMay 16th, 2009 at 3:20 pm

I do agree with Summer on some things in this post, but I disagree on points:

First: Bella and Edwards Relationship is more than just lust, although, like in any normal relationship, it is part. Edward is attracted to Bella because of the mystery of her mind, and her scent, of course, along with her clear, translucent skin, and her body. But, after the initial lust, he tries to find out who she is and falls in love with her bravery, maturity, and extreme love for the people close to her. Bella, in turn, lusts for Edward because of his (In her words) extreme, almost non-human beauty, his smell, his voice, etc. but she also loves his self-sacrifice (See in twilight, “There’s even more behind the face”), intelligance, and thoughtfulness. You can see they do love Each other, if you look closely.

Second: Although Jacob may seem like a better choice, he’s not. Where Edward will love Bella as long as she lives (Vampires are frozen in time forever, from the point they are transformed. They will always have the same likes, dislikes, personality, etc. So, therefore, any change, such as love, is permanent and forever.) Jacob is a werewolf, and therefore can imprint anytime in his life. Imagine Bella DID move on from Edward and went with acob. If he imprintedhe would leave Bella heartbroken yet again.

Third: This is just bugging me. Jacob isn’t neccassarily better for Bella. Look at Eclipse where Edward is constantly telling Bella that it’s O.K. if she wants to go with Jacob. That if she wants him for her, then he does too. Jacob on the other hand constantly bad-mouths Edward and his family, AND forces Bella to kiss him, first by force (Who’s bad for Bella again?), then by telling her he’ll commit suicide if she doesn’t! Jacobs better my…

Fourth: Girls are smarter than you think. Most don’t want a all-controlling dictator boyfriend. They want someone who’s content just laying down by them and humming them to sleep, who doesn’t care if they have sex, but who just wants them to be happy, and is content to step aside if need be (In Eclipse, Edward says to Bella many times that she can go and be with Jacob, that if that’s what she wants, he wants it too.) Girls want someone to love them, more than anything else. Maybe Twilights good, as it shows girls that if someone loves you, they don’t hurt you. That love is unconditional. As girls grow they’ll learn more about love, of course, and make their own mistakes, but not because of twilight.

Aitch CSMay 19th, 2009 at 2:14 pm

Hey, what’s wrong with a little lust.? I think that is what the whole story is about, prob. not intentionally, but that is my interpretation. Why shouldn’t women have unbridled lust over some gorgeous creature. ? The female lust thing is always either unacknowledged or squashed in most lit. and films.

KijodaMay 26th, 2009 at 7:02 pm

:cool: Wow these comments are surreal. Well I am a fan of the Twilight series, and a Mom. Do I think that Edward is possessive, no. Do I think Bella has dependency issues not more than any other woman/girl hopelessly in love.

What I am concerned about is how so many mothers are upset about the relationships of these two individuals. Dont you remember what your first love was like? How he kissed you? How you couldnt bare to breathe without him? If not the first then at least someone that impacted your life so much so that became intoxicated with the romance. Romances like the twilight series, are not far from those that are found in pride and prejudice, or romeo and juliet. It is really scary hearing the Moms rant about the possesive relationship. Maybe I am like alot of the mid tweens although I know that I am more rationale than a fantasy serier.

I think the twilight story is a good one. Although I do have issues with many facets of the series mainly Jacobs inabilility to respect when a women means and says no it means no. Jacob really got on my nerves especially in books 3 &4. Come on Jacob and Charlie took that kiss and basically said its was ok to force yourself on a women. Who in the world would want that for their daughter? Not me.

I think that the consideration of lust vs. love has been an age old debate. Come on who hasnt lusted for the man they loved. Really could you really see yourself with someone that didnt make your blood boil when he work that shirt that brought out his eyes, or played a sport that showed off his athleticism, or manuevered that board meeting so that he could make that winning bid! Of course you have. Come on .. we dont have to be dead to beleive in that or fantasize for that matter. Thank god! its just that THAT potential has to be limited to our reality. With that said if we were raise our daughters to keep the proper perspective and intuitiveness than we have planted the seed that can be sowed to make the right decisions and or learn from the wrong ones, hopefully. No one is perfect.

I have to admit I did have issues with Bella since I cannot relate to the clumsyness or her always finding ways to risk her life on choices that in my opinion would be better served with well thought out solutions - she sometimes seemed irrational but she is a teenager. However I will accept that of her since her selflessness and unabashed persona is a flaw which Edward loves and drives him as well as some of themes in this book in different directions.

I have one other point I would like to make as a reader of these serier to SM specifically and that is that I was disappionted that Bella and Edward lots of times made life altering decisions without discussing them in detail or at least a few sentences worth in the book. Specifically when Edward choses to leave Bella in NM I think he should of discussed his decision with her. At least try to listen to how his decision would affect her, I guess the author was trying to promote his arrogance. But then both characters are flawed with that trait and I think that would troublesome to rationalize in terms of the considering the success of how couples should really work together. I just thought that at some point priot to his decision he should of helped Bella understand since he pretty much had tried to leave her since he met her and fell in love with her. It was debating it through out Midnight sun. It was only in the begining of NM did he finally act or was forced to to save Bella.

I understand the whole concept of the drama behind him having to tell her he didnt love her however I really did not grasp if he loved her why not discuss his fears plainly. Or like Darcy put it in a letter!

Secondly when Bella decided she wanted to keep her pregnancy with Renesmee against Edwards wishes. This drove me crazy most of all (along with the Renessmee with Jacob to me that was like incestous - I mean why couldnt Jacob imprint on Emily and Sams kid - not on the womens child that he was spurned by uggh too weird for me). I think that she should have discussed her decision in detail with Edward and the reader should of been brought into to understand that tete n tete between the two. Since it seemed odd for two people again in love to not discuss the rational and risks in keeping the child. I understand their was little known about the subject but the pain that they all experienced was weighted by the inept whole that was unfilled with the breakdown in communication between Edward and Bella. These are the only times that I could not relate with the relationship (even from a fictional perspective). It just seemed obtuse. Especially since Bella and Edward are quite intelligent shouldnt they be able to talk to each 0ther And I do understand both their positions on the matter however I just feel that it is a real character flaw that SM did not give these characters the ability to discuss issues beyond negotiating when they would be married, consumation of their relationship and the jump for mortality to immortality. Since two decisions impacted the plots significantly.

I also think it would of been nice if the pregnancy would of been portrayed a little less grossly but ok it is a fantasy/mythical creature we are dealing with but I thing SM went a lead buck wild in that regard. Who wouldnt be scarred on that account!

LaurenMay 27th, 2009 at 1:27 pm

:heart: Wow! You all are a bunch of whiners!!!!! If you don’t like the way it’s written, don’t read it yourself or let your kids read it. The characters and situations are the way they are for a reason–they were CREATED this way…I highly doubt that Ms. Meyer was thinking politics when she wrote these. These are fantasy books….not social commentaries!!!!

RosannaJune 3rd, 2009 at 2:51 pm

To be honest, when I first watched the Twilight movie I felt the way you do. I thought Edward only wanted Bella because of her scent and that they were getting extremley carried away.
But after reading the books and especially the first few leaked chapters of Midnight Sun, my opinion has changed.

In this book showing Edward’s views and thoughts concerning their first meeting and journey through the first novel, it is clear that to begin with the only thing that draws Edwards attention to Bella is the fact that he can not read her mind and secondly that her scent is overwhelmingky appealing to me. An curiosity and obsession for her grows inside him not unlike every other teenage boy(portrayed in the book by Mike), but as the book continues Edward notices things in bella which where not primarly obvious such as her selflessness and bravery. This is what he falls in love with.

At first their relationship is wrapped up in looks, scent and curiosity but it does transform into love on both parts. Besides when Edward left, both of them fell apart, unable to continue their lives, would that really have happened if there relationship was only based on lust??

I would also like to point out that this is a fictional story, he’s a vampire! It was never going to be even close to real life. So even if their dependance on eachother is impossible or wrong or whatever you think, it is just a story. SM is telling a story that focuses on love. If you don’t believe their love to be possible, then don’t read it. But to be honest I think that if you’re ever going to find someone to spend your life with then he’s going to be the one you would gladly die for, just like Romeo and Juliet or anyother tragic love story.

TinaJune 22nd, 2009 at 10:10 am

I totally agree, had my daughter watch this so she could point out all the dangers of this relationship. (besides Edward being a vampire of course) She is only 11 and even she saw that Edward was domineering, controlling and said he was too creepy. lol
The only attraction I could see that teenagers would get out of this is the mysterious danger part. However there are other ways to satisfy that such as skydiving, bungee jumping which is much better because your not committed to the cord watching you sleep at night or following you aroud. ha ha
Anyway glad to see there are those out there to see how lame this story was and most of all unhealthy.

JenJune 30th, 2009 at 3:01 am

I agree with you both. lol. Hes like some sor of stalker. haha.

SadeeJuly 7th, 2009 at 11:01 am

If it you guys dislike the books so much (or the characters) then why do you bother reading them? Rosanna has come up with the best conclusion in my opinion.

helloJuly 14th, 2009 at 11:58 am

true lust for sure.
One of the things I’m very disapointed about is that Smeyer made Bella put herself in danger to hear Edward’s voice, using Jacob and endangering Jessica in the process, and we’re supposed to see it as incredibly romantic . Yuck.

jenAugust 4th, 2009 at 9:42 am

:blink: Well, we obviously read the book because we were curious.

lucyAugust 8th, 2009 at 12:37 am

i like bella and edward together i just hate it y does jake have to get in the way he just screws everything up ,i have ony read the first 3 and i really dont like jacob, bella can be selfish but she loves edward and he loves her aswell its just jake that causes the problems :)

AnnaSeptember 24th, 2009 at 10:49 am

:wassat: I think people who worry about messages that books (or ANY other form of media) send to people and children need to wake up! Fiction is not meant to and should NEVER be teaching anyone anything! To do so kinda takes away from the text book definition of “fiction”? People should read to enjoy a good made up story and then leave it be. If it causes you to dwell on some issues, Kudos for being open minded enough to spend some time in deep reflective thinking. So therefore, respectfully, I don’t agree with a thing you’ve said, because all I could hear was blame. You might’ve carried more punch if you’d stuck with a literary type review. Fiction shouldn’t teach anything.

SummerSeptember 24th, 2009 at 1:35 pm

To say that fiction shouldn’t teach anything doesn’t mean that it doesn’t teach anything. Anyone who reads is looking to learn about something. Whether it’s about a different place or time or a different way of thinking. Reading goes hand in hand with learning whether you realize that or not. Some of the greatest truths I’ve seen in literature have come through in fictional stories.

BeckyOctober 23rd, 2009 at 5:35 am

I hated the books, mostly for the reasons you’ve given about the relationship between Edward & Bella. I could go on and on about the things that are wrong with those books and with Bella as a role model. (Just ick!) I disagree about Jacob being okay for her though as there comes a point where he is forcing himself on Bella (but gets stopped).

I remember being an impressionable teen and thinking I was in love many times. I also have teenage daughters, one who has made some really stupid choices in life because she thinks she’s in love. I’ve even been in a relationship (in the past) where my every move was controlled. The Twilight series are horrible influences on the minds of girls.

RebeccaNovember 25th, 2009 at 12:32 am

I love all of the different opinions expressed here. I just view these movies (as a 21 year old girl/woman.. whatever haha) as… just fun little fantasy over the top lustful lovely love stories! I mean, it’s so absurd and silly, but yet.. it’s lovely. No, Bella and Edward aren’t watching television, fighting over what show to watch, they aren’t farting in front of each other for the first time… they aren’t burning supper, realizing that they have really bad breathe in the morning… I mean, if you want to read about REAL, nasty, sometimes just halirious real love… there are several books to choose from. This one doesn’t focus on the realities of love, it’s a fantasy. If you could really be in love with someone, look in their eyes and be swept away, not much talking, had this perfect little drama..he’s a vampire, oh no, I’m clumsy, he loves me!… I mean… who doesn’t wish that there was this dreamy guy out there that loves you, that you were content spending every single moment with… in your mind you go there every once in awhile… it’s a fun fantasy. REALITY on the other hand…”babe, please, go hang out with your friends, I want to watch Twilight tonight”… those words came out of my mouth. I love it. I love the characters, I think they are fun… the plot is dreamy… kind of cheesy, but whatever. It’s only if impressionable kids watch it and think that that is how love REALLY is… because they are going to have a life of pure sadness and despair… love it nasty, there is a lot more talking things out… for real on that one… I liked that these books and the movies allowed for me to dream a little, to smile… love is so much fun… I would never want it to be like the characters in this movie, but… I’m just happy there is a piece of literature out there for me to read if I ever feel like escaping into a fun little fantasy world, to be rudely woken up by a loud fart in the middle of the night :smile:

BrendaDecember 6th, 2009 at 6:21 pm

First let me start with saying. It’s a romance novel. I have read all four books and found them to be captivating. What people need to realize is the difference between fiction and non fiction. In reality it’s not unhealthy to be loved the way Edward loves Bella as long as it’s done out of love. There is a major difference between love and being co dependent. They are certainly in love and not lusting for one another. These movies/books show the unity of a family. How when you stick together as a family nothing is impossible. Maybe it’s hard from some of us to actually accept this kind of love because it’s what we as humans lack in most of our lives. When you have unconditional love between family and your mate everyone stands up for one another regardless what the problem may be. It’s call true love!

Lillian Bella R.December 23rd, 2009 at 2:52 pm

###############SPOILERS##############################################
I’m now thirteen, but I started reading the series when I was eleven.Being sincere, I like the books and that was a nice way of spendin some time with fantasies, but nothing else
Now, I must break your bubble if you think things get better, ’cause they get worse.In the las book B. is brusied all over her body after she and E. have their wedding night. Nice huh?
Then she gets pregnant and the baby breaks her bones.Cute? Ewww!
And you know what?She’s perfectly fine with all of it.
Now,that’s most definetly not a good message for teenagers.The idea is to make themnot want a baby being so young and being reeeeeeeeeeeeeally careful with sex; but these books are doing the opposite if the children are not mature enough for understanding the difference between what works for fiction and what works for real life.
I’m not against geting pregnant or whatever you can think due to the fact that I’m so young.For my age I’m pretty mature and, you know what? I think if I wre told that I can’t have children, it would break my heart, ’cause there’s nithing I love more than kids.
I guess some of you know fanfiction.net, so if you are interested, there’s a story thre that shows what would happen in real life in a relationship like the one between E. and B.. It’s called Mutually Assured Destruction, and is pretty graphic in sex, so be warned.
Thanks God there still are girls that actually think!
P.D.: My name is Lillian BELLA, ’cause I’ve like that name since I was five years old.

Angie Bella CullenDecember 31st, 2009 at 11:46 am

i think you are seriously wrong about StephenieMeyer’s Twilight books
The way edward love bella is well, amazing!

its just becos there isnt any one like edward is in this world thats why the book is termed as FICTION. cos the kind of love is too much
too much for ‘mortal’ people to feel for someone. Its kind of impossible.

if someone love you like that as edward does to bella, as selfless, protective you wouldnt say that. Its because they LOVE each other so much, as much as anyone in this world could have love someone thats why they cant live w/o each other.
Seriously i dont agree with your term ‘ codependency’. Its LOVE. TRUE LOVE.
The kind of love any girl will want, will dream for.

And yes, Im a teenager
and i think you and some of your commenters are old mums or something
who long ago already gave up on dreaming, wanting true love.
Thats why you all cant understand stephenie’s novel
She is like my saviour i think
Im so glad i read twilight series
over and over again too
and watched both twilight , new moon movie over and over again
She created a wonderful novel. And i love them all.

<3Team Stephenie! :heart:
<3Team Edward! :heart:

RaynaJanuary 19th, 2010 at 1:39 am

:blink: Are you seriously Kiding me? It’s a freakin book, not a relationship guide. And Bella is not pathetic, she’s just a normal teenager. I think you are reading way too much into the series. For one It isn’t 2 teenagers from highschool “falling in love”, it’s a Vampire and a human falling in love, so of course the relationship isn’t going to be “normal”. For two Bella doesn’t just love Edward for his beauty and danger, it’s way deeper than that. For three due to their mortal/immortal relationship, It’s hard to understand something that’s immpossible to feel in real life. And lastly, this is a fictional novel written about mythical creatures so of course there is going to be weird or not normal things happening in it. Get a grip it’s written for entertainment.

RaynaJanuary 19th, 2010 at 2:02 am

I think some people took Jacob and bella’s kiss too far, although I totally understand how easily it was to do so. I took it as Jacob taking a chance and kissing her, and since he’s so strong he didn’t feel her trying to fight him off and then he joked about it and then he apologized because he felt bad. It was mentioned in the book that charlie did not aprove of kissing a girl without permission, so he was not ok with the kiss.

savannaApril 3rd, 2010 at 12:30 pm

Look people bella needs to be with edward who is the HOTTEST guy on the face of the earth
and they dont just lust for one other they love one other so back for saying she should be with jacob NO SHE NEEDS TO BE WITH EDWARD thats why he asked her to marry him and not beaues of that what your saying beaues they love one other,so no one can try to take her away from him.so TEAM EDWARD TEAM EDWARD EDWARD IS THE HOTTEST GUY ON THE FACE OF THE EARTH!!!!!!

lostlittlemiApril 6th, 2010 at 9:21 am

I do not agree with most of these weird comments.as I have read all the books in fact I read them all within a week.now I’m re-reading them for the fifth time. Victoria ends up dead,there is a war and Bella gives birth to renesmee.

I know every single detail about the books.so?Any questions??

edward is the hottest guy after Leonardo decaprio

RosieMay 24th, 2010 at 7:08 pm

I totally agree with everything you said! My sister and I were talking about this very subject this morning, and we couldn’t come up with an answer. So I googled “Why are edward and bella in love?” and I got your page. All of your views I agree with! I know I already said that but its true. Thanks for sharing your views!!!!!!!

DianeMay 29th, 2010 at 8:43 pm

In other words, by your logic, Bella should do what YOU think would be right for her.

Not what BELLA choses and thinks is right for herself.

Like it or not, just because Bella’s relationship and choice with Edward isn’t what YOU would want, doesn’t mean it’s not right for Bella.

This is Bella and Edward’s love story. Who are you to label someone else’s love?

Bella and Edward are in love. Period. End of debate.

Why?

Because SM wrote them to be.

Stop re-writing the story the way you want it. Better yet, write your own.

SylJune 23rd, 2010 at 2:36 am

My hat off to SM…I believe she wrote a wonderful love story between Edward and Bella. there may be many readers that do not like this story but I’m sure SM knew there would be many who would not like it. This was her dream, she has made it a reality in each book . Obviously, her story appears to be very real or there would not be so much hard feelings. The love of a vampire is supposed to be a true love for only one woman and Edward has chosen Bella . She in turn falls in love with this man and if you know true love or will know it in the future then you can see why she was so captivated by this vampire Man (his eyes, his voice, his scent) (as if he needed any of that ). as he so well put it……Rosanna, I agree with you . So remember one thing, these books (movies) are fictional…..they are some very talented lady’s dream written on paper. Should we be so lucky to be able to write a story that has so many convinced this story is real. Love is beautiful and kind . One never knows how deeply we will fall in love, Bella didn’t……….(smile)

kritiJune 24th, 2010 at 11:46 am

hey,
commend ur out of d box thinking bt nthng else..
1.dis story is being narrated by bella..and hence u perceive it as bella’s dependance on edward and d cullens…bt den if u go insyd edwardz mind..he also hs xactly d same feelings..
i mean wen edward left bella,derz just a 1 para description of wht edward ws doin in d meanwhile wen bella ws lifeless..bt dat is really touching..it ws more dan wht bella had undergone..much more..
2.love or lust???
telme 1 thng..hw does love happen? if u knw it u knw dat der iz a certain amount of mystery involved in love always..of course..nt being able 2 read her thoughts drove edward 2 bella…of course d danger n wierdness of d cullens dove bella 2 edward..bt dat was d beginning…der love is well defined in d succeeding buks…wen edward is evn ready 2 ’share’ or ‘give away’ bella 2 jacob if she likes it dat way….
3.d 1 v love shud also b our best friend
dis 1 is true..but dat was what the plot was all bout..bella finds a best friend and her love in 2 different people…a verrryyyyyyyy rare case but still possible and there is no harm in that..

i hope i have been able to clarify a few of ur notions..and yes,silly teenage girls(As u put it) will fall for the novel..coz we do believe in our dreams..i believe that an edward exists somewhere for me..and by that i don’t mean a vampire in a silver volvo..i mean a true lover..someone whose love for me exceeds his need for me…

ASHLEYJuly 1st, 2010 at 3:31 pm

:ninja: EDWARD YOUR A HAMSOME GUY ALL IM ASKING IS FOR BELLA TO HAVE THE BABY AND PUT PICS ON OF THE BABY HE OR SHE WILL BE CUTE BELLA IS A SWEET GIRL YOU SHOULD MARRIE HER I RILLY LIKE THE TWILITE SEGA AND TELL BELLA SHE IS A SWEET GIRL SHE IS LIKE A SISTER TO ME BECUSE MY MOM KNOWS BELLA AND WE WOULD LIKE TO MEET YOU IN REAL LIFE YOU ARE PROPLEY SO HOT IN REAL LIFE AS WELL SO JUST PUT PICS OF THE BABY ON THANK YOU : :biggrin:

Edward TeamJuly 7th, 2010 at 7:09 pm

Personally, I disagree. They must protect. What if they didn’t, she could be captured and held hostage, or bitten. She could be a bad vampire, Edward wouldn’t fight her. Or any of them. Jacob is hot, but more like caring brother. Edward is the one to me. He is sweet, and craves his Bella. Though he has protected her, she is still stubborn about him changing her. So, I hope you just see the light like everybody in my county does. If you look, you mught see.

“If it’s about my soul, take it!” -Bella to Edward :heart: :wub:

NkeonJuly 12th, 2010 at 1:09 pm

I’ve only watched the movies so I’ll just give my perspective based on that.

I like this saga and find it very captivating but I do agree with the poster that the relationship between Bella and Edward has a bigger emphasis on lust than love.

The lust isn’t all sexual. He’s aroused by her blood scent, but he’s also taken my her mental capacity and her fragility. He was protective of her before the threat of Victoria came about and it seems that his nature. He finds of worthy of protecting and so she becomes his world.
She on the other hand seems taken by his beauty in an intriguing rather than sexual way. His desire to protect her makes her feel safe and she’s in awe by his mystery.

It is sligthly reminiscient of Cathy and Heathcliffe in that it is built on passion rather than progressive and natural love and that is what makes the story intriguing; as was also the case for the quick developed romance between Romeo and Juliet.

You could also argue that his refusal to sleep with her until marriage is more of a reflection on his principles and coming froma different time to her, though the gesture does add a nice touch of innocence on the picture.

I see how the relationship is disturbing and I also see how it is soothing. i don’t think Meyer is trying to portray a conventional love story. If she were I’m sure she would have left out the vampires and werewolves from thr story. Edward as a vampire has a mixture if feelings towards human beings and one of them is lust as vampires lust by nature; they need to be satisfied by blood and not in the same way humans crave food.

Jacob is the good guy so he’s not interesting enough for Bella to develop a passion for but her love for her is more natural. When Edward leaves he brings out a different side to her, one that is happy, laughs and is playful. When you think in real life terms most women would describe their partners as doing this for them. Her love for Jacob is also progressive as she develops it as she grows closer to him and spends more time with him.

Anti-BedwardJuly 16th, 2010 at 11:25 am

I agree with all of those points. Personally,Jacob is better off without Bella and her obsessive,one track mind. Bella doesn’t deserve him.

Also,I was thinking about ‘imprinting’ and its issues. As described by Jacob,imprinting is when ” you’d be willing to be anything,do anything for her. She is the only thing that matters.” Isn’t that like the controlling and unhealthy relationship Bella and Edward have? It makes Jacob just like E/B with Renesmee. And it’s sad for her because she’ll never have a choice.Nessie won’t be able to fall in love with someone she chooses. Their ‘relationship’ will turn out like B/E.

It would’ve been better if 1) Bella chose Jacob;because they were truly in love, even if Bella was blinded by Edward to fully admit it. She was blinded by what she thought was love. 2) Jacob could’ve ended up with Leah. I’m not saying it could’ve been
insta-love,just that there was possibility for them.

So I’ve concluded that imprinting is as unhealthy as B/E’s relationship.Don’t get me started on the horrible writing,lack of character depth,etc.

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