Drive Thru Pee Peril or Why you should always have a water bottle in your car if you have boys

Imagine the setting:

A McDonald’s in the inner city area. This equals a tiny parking lot that is always packed with cars and people. The drive thru line is long and I’m querying the boys for their orders before we reach the speaker. It’s fairly quiet in the car until I hear Count Dooku’s worried voice say, “Mom,when we get home can we change my pants cause I fink I peed a little in dem.”

My head wheels around and I reach into the back seat to feel his pants. If they are indeed wet it must be a very tiny spot. I breathe a small sigh of relief and then ask him the question with the obvious answer, “Do you have to pee?”

“Yes” he says in a small voice.

The car in front of us pulls ahead.

“Why didn’t you tell me this before we left the museum?”

“Cause I didn’t feel like der was pee yet, but all da sudden I feel da pee.”

I snicker a little and drive forward again and then he continues in an urgent voice as he grabs his pants, “I have to pee mom. I fink I’m going to pee in da car.”

“Oh no you won’t!” I say as I drive forward up to the speaker.

“Can I take your order?” says the voice over the speaker.

“Yeah, just a second,” I say loudly and then to Count Dooku in the back, “Unbuckle and climb into the front seat right now.”

He does so, still holding himself. The anxious look in his eyes has increased 10 fold and I’m flying through options in my brain as I blurt out our order.

“I’d like two four piece nuggets, two small fries and a hamburger,” and then to Count Dooku, “Ok, take your pants down a little buddy.”

Now what? Do I have him run across the way to the dumpster and pee behind there? No, that won’t work, I’d have to drive forward and he’d freak out thinking I was leaving him.
Do I open the door slightly and have him pee out onto the pavement? No, the folks in their cars behind us would see.

I pull forward again right as Count Dooku has finished pulling his pants down enough to pee. I realize that we’re driving up to the window and the cashier is going to see his naked nethers so I push him onto his naked bum and pull his coat down.

“Don’t move!” I warn him

“Your total is $6.64,” says the cashier. I hand her my credit card, she swipes it and hands it back. I pull up a little.

“I’m gonna peeeeeeeee!”

Crap! What to do? What to do? I’m ready to throw the door open and let him pee out of it when I see the 3/4 full water bottle on the floor. It’s got a rather narrow opening but it will work. I roll the window down and dump the water out.

We’re between the first and second window with one car in front of us when I tell Count Dooku to start peeing. I’m holding the steering wheel with my left hand, and the water bottle with my right. The car in front of us drives away. It’s my turn to pull up but Count Dooku is still peeing.

“Come on, come on!” I say. The lady at the second window is holding our bag out of the window beckoning me to pull forward. I’m looking right at her shrugging my shoulder and trying to clearly mouth, “One second.”

She shakes her head and closes the window. Count Dooku is still peeing. Finally he finishes up, hurriedly pulls his pants up and I drive forward after rolling the tightly sealed water bottle under the seat. The lady opens the window and thrusts the bag into my hands. Count Dooku is climbing into the back seat and buckling his belt.

“I really fot I was gonna pee in da car mom,” he says, the anxiousness in his voice gone.

“I’m so glad you didn’t son,” I say. “next time, remind me to make you pee before we go on a car ride, whether you think you need to or not.”


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Comments (26)

AllysonFebruary 28th, 2008 at 4:01 pm

Awesome story. :D You’re like, SuperMOM!!

Gramma DuckyFebruary 28th, 2008 at 4:19 pm

O boy! I think I’d check my water bottles hanging around the house real close from here on out.

cherylFebruary 28th, 2008 at 4:46 pm

Hooray for boys! One of my favorite hilarious memories is watching DH show #3 how to pee in the woods while we were hiking. It’s the only thing I envy about men!

MelissaFebruary 28th, 2008 at 4:59 pm

This is something we haven’t done yet. KNOCK ON WOOD. At least you had a bottle…. :)

Deb - Mom of 3 GirlsFebruary 28th, 2008 at 5:00 pm

I had to laugh out loud when I read this - although with girls, I think it would be a whole lot harder in that situation! :)

feenerFebruary 28th, 2008 at 5:39 pm

god bless ya !!!

HillaryFebruary 28th, 2008 at 5:54 pm

Too funny!

AmberFebruary 28th, 2008 at 6:03 pm

LOVE this story. THough as one on the cusp of potty training a buy, it does make me a little bit nervous for what lies in store. :-)

BeckyFebruary 28th, 2008 at 6:31 pm

Ahh, the hilarity!! :) Although I think I have to agree with Deb - this situation would be immensely harder with girls! My experience has largely been one of begging and pleading to hold it in with everything they’ve got till we can get to a potty. Almost enough to make you buy one of those tiny little emergency potties (lined with plastic) for your car!!

Still, I applaud your creativity! And I hope you made sure to get that bottle out of the car. ;)

LeslieFebruary 28th, 2008 at 8:14 pm

Love the imagery! Now I’m scared for the day I potty train my 20 mo. baby boy! I’ll always rememer your sage advise :)

MeishaFebruary 28th, 2008 at 8:55 pm

LOL! I’ll have to remember to keep a water bottle around, I have a feeling I’ll be blogging about a similar experience in the not-too-distant future.
P.S. Dang it, I missed you on IM again!

HollyFebruary 28th, 2008 at 9:56 pm

Oh Summer! That is too funny. I’ve had so many similar experiences with my boys! You’re supermom for figuring out the water bottle thing on short notice like that!

DedeeFebruary 28th, 2008 at 10:12 pm

My bro did that with his boy. You aren’t the first, and I’m sure you won’t be the last.

Thank goodness for water bottles.

Richelle FFebruary 28th, 2008 at 10:44 pm

That’s hilarious. I’ll have to remember this. My son is two and we have been thinking about potty training. :)

thediaperdiariesFebruary 28th, 2008 at 11:54 pm

That is why mother’s should really make 6 figures :)

MariaFebruary 29th, 2008 at 12:03 am

I can’t believe you admitted to doing that! But I’m glad you did. I’m going to use that idea if the need comes. One time we were driving up to Niagra Falls when I was pregnant, and we got in a huge traffic jam. I was pratically in tears. I thought of using a zip lock baggy, but didn’t have the guts. I empathise with your son!

CristyFebruary 29th, 2008 at 12:12 am

Thanks for sharing that, I’m totally laughing, and commiserating, really… ;)

KellanFebruary 29th, 2008 at 12:26 am

Oh, good Lord - I was on the edge of my seat! Boy, you saved the day! That is an award moment that only us moms can appreciate - WOW! Great story - see you later Summer.


KristiFebruary 29th, 2008 at 11:10 am

I have had to stop and teach both of the boys how to pee on the side of the road without it being conspicuous. they are so lucky that they have the ability to aim.

C DuranFebruary 29th, 2008 at 2:40 pm

That was a great morning laugh. I’ll have to keep the water bottle idea in mind when traveling with my nephew!

LaurieFebruary 29th, 2008 at 3:42 pm

Nice save Mom! This is a great story!

childlifeMarch 1st, 2008 at 5:53 pm

Oh, I’m sorry about laughing at your expense, but that was just priceless! : D Kudos to you for your quick thinking!

kailaniMarch 3rd, 2008 at 6:00 am

Boys are so lucky that they can go pretty much anywhere. I can’t imagine Girlie Girl trying to aim into the bottle! LOL!

Once she had to go really bad and we were stuck in traffic. I had her put on Baby Bug’s diaper and go in there. Bad Mommy!

PaigeMarch 6th, 2008 at 3:30 pm

That is awesome! We have a garbage can in the car, several water bottles, and even some diapers. In a pinch, the kids could use any of these as a makeshift potty, I guess. But quick thinking on your part–especially when you have to hide from the drive through people.

tiffMarch 7th, 2008 at 11:46 pm

OH I loved this! Just loved it and I will have to remember to keep water bottles in the bus when Noah is toilet trained! Brilliant!

joshua congdonDecember 3rd, 2010 at 6:15 pm

good story i love stories like this yeah it’s a good thing that you had a bottle laying around in the car i will make sure to keep that kind of thing in the car for now on wheather i have kids or not some day because like everyone says when you gotta go you gotta go

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